Mission: Dine and Dash

[7eleven]

The bar was actually pretty dead, considering it was early afternoon. There were a few patrons, but none of them were drinking.

Time to find you a sword.

[CDF]

Z, not being known for his subtly, was less than quiet upon entering the bar. Simply for dramatic entry purposes, he actually kicked the door open instead of pushing it so that he could walk in like a bad ass.

”HEEEEELLLOOOO VIETNAM! Whatever the hell that means.”

With the gait of a man who was full of himself, Z walked up to the bar counter and took a seat, examining the bar tender before speaking abruptly. “A guy with a sword come by here ever?”

[7eleven]

Changing the mission to a B-rank. You okay with that?

[CDF]

OOC: Yea

[7eleven]

The man shrugged off the odd display of the man that had just entered the building. Sure, all he was wearing was underwear, and he may very well be crazy, but if he was going to buy a drink, who cared? "Well, I got guys with swords in here all the time, but I have a fairly good memory. Anything in particular you were looking for?"

[CDF]

Z looked at the bartender and tried to tell if he was lying. While doing this, Z realized he had no way of telling if he was being lied to, so he just proceeded on the premise that he was being honest and didn’t know who Z was talking about. “Well, the sword like, spreads disease or something. People call it demonic and shit cause it drives the wielder insane and it can materialize some huge shadow thing. That’s all I know about it, belonged to some weak missing nin that got his ass capped.”

[7eleven]

"Actually, I think I do remember the sword you're talking about. The guy with that thing, and two other guys, fought in here. Really fucked up my bar. One of the other guys fought using a bunch a wood, which, I have to admit, was pretty damn cool. Especially when he used it to help patch the place up after the fight had taken it's toll." As he spoke, he made a drink and passed it to another man sitting at the bar, who sipped at it quietly.

"You want a drink?"

[CDF]

Z smiled at the sexy young bartender as she asked him if he wanted to go back to her place and have the night of his life. She was so attractive, her sexy red dress and high heels. It made him wonder how she managed to find herself being a bartender in a place like this.

"Trying to get me drunk so you can get in my pants? I approve."

Should we tell him?
Nah.

Z seemed to have heard what the woman had said before clearly so he responded to it with another smirk. "Awesome sauce. Any idea where the sword is now?"

So we're really not going to tell him?
He'll find out once he gets to third base.

Z wasn't listening to the voices in his head, he had learned to drone them out when necessary, so he had no clue that the woman he had seen was a hallucination.

[7eleven]

The man was a bit put off by the man's...advances, but, in order to preserve both business and health, he didn't say anything to try and anger the crazy man at his bar. "Well...no...not really. The two men that killed the man took it. Sometimes, though, the younger of the two will stop in here for a drink. He's a hot-headed kid, always bragging. From Konoha, I think. He might have the sword, he seemed to be more of a melee fighter than the other guy did."

[CDF]

Z looked the sexy women up and down, eating her with his eyes as she spoke. Her firm, full, beautiful lips seemed like heaven to him as she gave him information he needed. All he could think about, all he could picture, was his lips against hers, his body against hers. He could feel her warmth, he could feel her skin against his. Her grizzly face rubbing aga- Wut.

aaaaaaaahahaha, nicely done.
Baby steps, maybe he’ll realize the truth

Z shook his head, ignoring the more masculine features of his angel for now. “Er.., know where they went?”

[7eleven]

"Well, actually, the kid comes in here from time to time. I give him a couple of free drinks since he and his older friend patched my bar up after the fight, so he drops in to cash in on that and brag about various things he's done, which would piss me off if it wasn't so interesting."

And, as if Jashin sent down a shining ray of hope for Z, a very arrogant shinobi walked through the door, the symbol of Konoha emblazoned on his forehead. He walked, head high, towards the bar to take a place at his usual seat, which just so happened to be to places to the left of Z. "Hey, I'll have the usual and a glass of water. How's it been?"

[CDF]

Z frowned, nearly wept, as his hallucination faded away entirely and revealed the unattractive man that was hidden beneath. He was lucky that his target walked in at that very moment, otherwise, Z would have killed him in anger. With his mood better now that his mission was getting easier, however, Z scooted over a seat, leaving only one between him and the target. “Pffff, be a real man, get something with alcohol.” Commencing plan get him drunk, get our sword, rape his mother.
….
Yea.

[7eleven]

The arrogant shinobi glanced at the odd looking, and oddly extroverted, man, laughing slightly as the bartender placed three glasses on the counter in front of him. The three glasses contained water, a yellowish, carbonated liquid, and a brown liquid that was most likely the alcohol. In a swift, practiced motion, the man dropped the shot glass of alcohol into the glass of the carbonated drink, and chugged it well before Z would have even had a chance to blink. "JaegerBOMB!"

[CDF]

Z watched with interest and laughed loudly at the show. In truth, he didn’t really care and he knew damn well he could outdrink this guy, but he had some information he needed and getting drunk wouldn’t help him, the other guy was the one who needed to get drunk. “That was awesome dude, that’s a one time thing though, right? You can’t do that more than what, six times? The alcohol would probably burn your throat and you wouldn’t be able to take it.

[7eleven]

"Pfffffft. Dude, you have no idea. I'll be drinking these babies all night. Bartender!" The bartender, within a few seconds, replaced his two glasses with fresh ones. Repeating the same process as before (dropping, chugging, shouting), he downed a second drink and wiped his mouth his forearm.

"So, am I drunk, or are you only wearing underwear?"

[CDF]

Z grinned wide and chuckled at the comment, speaking to him in that typical tone one uses to speak to a drunk. He saw his chance and he calmed his randomness so he could get his damn sword. “See? I told you, you can’t take it. You took just that and you already thinkn I’m wearing just underwear. There’s no way you can drink more than that, I’m willing to bet my left hand on it.” The taunt was out, time to see if it worked.

[7eleven]

And the guy, being the arrogant man that he was, took the bait hook, line, and JAEGERBOMB. The bartender placed the glasses in front of him again, which he swiftly dropped and downed. "Dude, you have no idea. I could drink all night. You really don't have a clue." Despite his words, however, his speech was beginning to slur.

[CDF]

“No, I do have a clue. You can only drink all night if your definition of a night is an hour.” Z was getting really into this. It was almost as fun as hurting people. Almost. He usually didn’t waste his time manipulating people, but it was semi-necessary at the moment. He wouldn’t do this much longer, the guy should be drunk enough by now that he’d start doing something stupid. He just wanted to make him drink a little more so he could be sure.

[7eleven]

I have...no idea what to do with that.

What is Z talking about at the start?

[CDF]

OH LORD, sorry, i didn't mean to copy and paste that

edited.

[7eleven]

"Hey, bartender! Something a little bit stronger, please?" The bartender rolled his eyes at the man's stubbornness, but not because he was worried. He'd seen this patron drink, and he knew how well he could hold his liquor. He set a stinky, brown mixture on the bar in front of the man, which he drank in large gulps. "Y'know, you keep talking shit about me, man, but I don't seen you drinking shit."

[CDF]

Z grinned as he nodded his head at the bartender, pointing at the drink he had just given his new friend, asking for one so he could drink as well. "I'm on a mission, that's why. I can't be drunk when i find the awesome sword i heard about, i'll get swindled out of all my money."

Change of plans. Z wasn't planning on getting drunk, but what was the point of a drunken fist style if you didn't use it while drunk?

[7eleven]

Around that time, the man started losing the ability to effectively mix his drink, and had the bartender bring him something strong that he could sip at as opposed to something he had to mix and chug. "Hey, I think we have similar interests. I happen to have a really awesome sword."

[CDF]

Z smiled wide as he perked his head up with fake and deliberate interest.
"Oh? Got it on you?" commence operation bad ass.

[7eleven]

"As a matter of fact, I do." And, with that, the man bit his thumb to draw blood. He applied blood to a seal on the back of his neck, previously obscured by his shirt, and pulled the sword from his back. "Man, just look at this thing. I love it."

[CDF]

Z examined the weapon, making an intrigued face as he resisted the urge to kill the guy here and now and just swipe the sword. But A) he didn't know if this was the sword he was looking for and B) he had made it a challenge to do this in a stealthy, manipulative manner. Like a boss.


"Woah, cool, what's it do?"

[CDF]

OOC: :/

[Kao]

KSO, I'm changing up dude's personality a bit to actually fit how it is on the app....

The man leaned back on his stool, resting the sheathed sword in his lap. "It kills people, like a sword is supposed to do."

You are so...worthless... The man's eyebrow twitched at the sudden acidic voice swirling through his mind. Cut his throat and spill his blood...let me feed on it... The man raised his glass, downing the new drink in one gulp. He tapped his fingers on the hilt of his katana. He smacked the table with his opposite hand and two more drinks immediately glided towards them. "I'm guessing you don't have a sword, since you're only in underwear, huh?"

[CDF]

Z looked at the guy with an amused face. Obviously, he was completely shitfaced if he didn’t manage to see all of the swords littered throughout Z’s body.

Z grinned however, seeing his opportunity here. “I got plenty. Here’s one of my favorites, however.” Z replied as he pulled out the large dream eating sword and placed it on the counter, holding it by the hilt.

“This baby’s so amazing. It’s the only sword I know that makes people actually feel good. If you get stabbed on the hand or on the feet by it, like, all the way through, it feels almost like you’re drunk, except, without the drunkenness. And the wound heals right after, watch.”

Z suddenly just impaled his hand into the swords end, letting it skewer right through, smiling wide and sighing with pleasure for a second. Right after, he pulled his hand out and showed it to his new drunk friend, showing his hand healing. “See? Try it.”

[Kao]

The man raised his eyebrow as the wound slowly began go close. Intrigued, he reached for the other's blade. He coughed as he extended his hand, trying to dispel the feeling of lightheadedness. As soon as his fingers clasped around Z's blade, a piercing scream filled Nameless Dude's ears. The scream embodied manic hatred and bloodlust and pounded against his mind.

"SHUT UP! FUCKIN'--"

He released the other man's sword; as soon as he let go, the screaming stopped. He grabbed the drink in front of him and tossed it towards Z's face. "You tryin' to trick me, asshole? You can't kill me! I'm a mushroom cloud layin' motherfucker, motherfucker!"

[CDF]

Z sighed, but then smiled right after. He didn’t know how the guy was tipped off, nor did he care really. The being cunning was fun and interesting, but it wasn’t his area of expertise. This, however, was. Z didn’t even dodge the incoming glass of alcohol, he just grabbed his sword and lurched forward, attempting to impale the man’s chest with his sword.

Because of the distance, he would likely hit the man. However, since he let the alcohol hit his face, Z was temporarily blind, meaning his aim was rather off. Either way, Z just wanted to get the sword into the man’s body somewhere.

[Kao]

Well, fuck. In his angry fit, the man didn't much notice Z's lunge for his chest. Luckily for him, the blade did not pierce his chest.

But his shoulder wasn't much of a better option.

With a raging wail, he slashed the air in front of Z with his sword. Drunken bastard couldn't even get a good hit on him. Bleeding freely, he screamed right along with his sword (lusting for blood and such).

The sword really hated this guy. The man was weak, and the weapon deserved a stronger wielder. Nevertheless, the man continued trying to slash open Z's throat. By this time, the bar had cleared out in fear of being caught in the crossfire. The bartender was hunched over in a corner, mulling over the fate of his poor bar. The guys were really messing it up.

[CDF]

With an astoundingly calm nature, with which Z was not usually seen in, he simply put his hand up as the sword came to slash him while his sword impaled the man in the shoulder. The mans sword struck into Z’s hand, allowing Z to clench down on it and stop it from swinging.

From impaling the mans shoulder, Z absorbed all of his memories, most importantly, all of his memories with his sword. It wasn’t something he had expected, the way the sword was actually sentient. It seemed to have droven a some-what normal man to the edge of insanity, which explained why Z felt so normal near him.

”Cool.” Was all Z said as he released the memory sword and pulled out his magnet one, attempting to pull the man by his sword while jamming his magnet sword upwards into his brain, avoiding most of the skull by going beneath his chin. He had grown bored of fighting a drunk already, now he just wanted to test drive the sword.

[Kao]

Damn, he dead.

[Pass]