Calm the Human Heart

[Willoria]

The walk back from the training caves had felt like forever with Jinsai across her shoulders, but what really took up her time was what came next. When she got back to Jinsai's home she had set about to taking care of the man immediately. She had cleaned him up, practically bathing him before changing his clothes for something clean, a simple pair of pants and a t-shirt. Once she had gotten him into bed to rest and relax she'd set about with various wraps and bandages as well as using the salves she had to help the muscles she was sure would be most sore after the fight and transformation. The woman had even set up a bit of aromatherapy before seeing to her own hurts. She cleaned herself up with a quick shower, bandaging her forearms carefully afterwards and even wrapping a bandage around her head to keep the gauze in place for the small wound she'd taken from slamming into the wall. She had changed back into just her long t-shirt again before going back to Jinsai's bedroom.

She really had intended on just checking on the man and going back to work on something else. But when she sat down next to him she had simply grown weary and laid her head down for a moment, only to accidentally fall asleep. And so was how he would find her when he eventually woke.

[TyDie]

Darkness. The man was enveloped by suffocating darkness, falling eternally into darkness. And yet, this darkness surrounding him felt hot, his lungs felt as if they were filled with smoke, the overwhelming scent of brimstone filled his nostrils. He felt as if he was burning, and yet he also felt like the very life force of his body was being drained from him, slowly but surely leaving him an empty husk. He opened his mouth to scream, but all that came out was a ragged cough. He tried to open his eyes, to take in his surroundings and see the source of his torment for himself, but all he could see was more darkness... and all he could hear was the crackling of a wildfire around him.

The featureless void was broken by a pair of four small eyes, like smoldering cinders, piercing the veil along with his very soul.
"Welcome home, 'Master'. Hmhmhmhm..."

---

With a gasp, Jinsai's eyes darted open as he shot up in his bed, panting for breath as sweat covered his body. His eyes, struggled to ascertain his surroundings, his heart was thumping through his chest, and his head pounded with ache. And then the rest of his pain set in as his body throbbed and tensed, a groan of pain escaping his lungs as he closed his eyes and laid back down in a heap. "God... what happened?" the man spoke to himself, not realizing he wasn't alone yet. His hand rose up so that he could look at it, noticing that his forearms had been wrapped as if Masako had cared for him... Wait. Masako. She had come by hadn't she?

It was then that he turned his head to see that she was asleep in his bed with him, and she looked positively exhausted. And upon seeing her face, the memories came flooding back. The rage, the anger, the hatred that he had released when he became that... thing. And she had pushed him to it. She... made him do this. Why? He had to know... but looking at her like this, even with all that anger and fury within him, her face seemed to tame the flame within. At the least, it had calmed from an inferno to a mere blaze.

With a bandaged arm, he'd reach out to lightly caress her cheek.

[Willoria]

Masako groaned quietly at the touch. She truly hadn't meant to fall asleep. She was supposed to be watching over him and taking care of him in these moments. That was half the point of what she had done. And yet here she was, she felt his touch on her cheek and the woman's bright green eyes fluttered open to see him looking at her. At first she simply looked back at him, a small smile on her face before the events of the day came back to her as well and she suddenly sat up with a start. She looked around and touched a hand to her head with a groan, the sudden movement having dizzied her briefly due to the knock to the head she'd taken. She sighed and looked at him a moment. "Sorry... I hadn't meant to fall asleep." she said quietly.

The woman sighed and looked around again, remembering what she had been doing before she'd fallen asleep. She turned back to Jinsai and immediately reached for one of his arms to check his bandaging. "How're you feeling?" she asked him. "If its worn off already, I can get more ointment and redo this? I had put some on your chest and shoulders too, that probably needs redone as well..." She took another glance and saw the incense had burned out as well and frowned. "I'll have to set up another aromatherapy for you too..."

[TyDie]

Jinsai scanned her face as she opened her eyes, slowly regaining consciousness as she hadn't quite realized what was going on. For that brief instant, the both of them were content. Happy, even. But the moment quickly passed as the woman rose suddenly, apologizing and immediately talking about all of the things she would need to do to take care of him. "Stop, Masako." Jinsai spoke quietly, with a raspy voice, making clear he was no doubt dealing with a dry throat and a lot of fatigue. Nevertheless, he would reach out to grab her anyway he could, by the wrist or leg or something, to keep her near him. ""Just stop."

With strain and a grunt of pain, the man pushed himself up with his elbows against his backboard, leaning against it like a chair as his eyes squinted with strain. And yet, if she moved to comfort him, he would hold up a hand to stop her, making clear that at least for now, her role as his slave wasn't in effect. They were just people right now. "I get it, Masako. I know what you were trying to do. It's the same way that some Fukusha force the awakening of their Shogo Zumi... The same way my brother did, actually."

He looked at his bandaged forearms as his thoughts went to his brother, a small sad smile crossing his face as he chuckled lightly. "I tried the same thing... never worked for me. Just like I knew this wouldn't work for me."

[Willoria]

As his hand closed over her wrist and he asked her to stop a second time, Masako froze up, turning to look at him for a moment. As expected, when he moved to sit up, she immediately went to try and help him. At the least she went to try and set him up with a couple of pillows or something but he immediately stopped her again and the woman found herself kneeling on the bed, facing him and unsure of what to do or how to proceed. As he went on, Masako's green eyes dropped to the bed as she sighed quietly. "Akari do the same." she said quietly. "Most of us when we're young, we all hate the ways we're raised with. But something always happens and we're forced into it. Some grow to love the violence, others just grow to accept it, some never do. They just do what they have to in order to get by. I was one of the ones in the middle." she admitted, her voice still quiet before she shrugged.

She moved on her knees across the bed until she was directly next to him, shifting to lean against him as she sat again. Carefully she reached for one of his hands to take in one of hers, hoping he wouldn't recoil though she couldn't lift her eyes to meet his. "You're one of the strongest people I know, mentally especially... I just wanted to help show you that you could control it, and that I could help you..." she didn't want to admit she failed, she didn't feel like she had entirely. "In the end you did start to gain control, I could see it. You weren't yourself, but there were signs that you were in there. I saw it."

[TyDie]

Jinsai had heard plenty of the traditions of the Akari clan in his time being partnered up with Ume, both before and during the Great War. He knew full well the brutality that was expected of them, and that they either got with the program, or their shiin were simply taken by those that were more willing than they were. The savage cycle of the strong devouring the weak needed to stop, but this wasn't the time for that conversation...She went on to lean against him, caressing one of his hands, both of which were allowed despite the dull pain throbbing through his body as she did so. Unlike before, he completely hid his reaction - He didn't want her to realize it and move off of him.

"You're right, Masako. I can control it. And you can help me. The change was... God, it was unlike anything I've ever felt. The strength and power, sure it felt great, but the burning pit of rage... It was horrible. I felt like my insides were aflame, like my very soul was ignited with rage." Jinsai trailed off, closing his eyes and gulping as he felt that familiar anger welling up again... it took so much more than before to control himself. His other hand, the one not held by Masako, came up to wrap gently around her head, holding her tight to his chest as he rest his chin on her head.

"You can help... but it can't be like that. I will deal with this, and when I'm ready to, I'll ask for your help. Okay?"

[Willoria]

Her fingers ran over the top of his hand gently, her other hand moving to join the first fairly quickly as she listened to him describe what had happened to him. She wanted to smile but somehow she knew he hadn't enjoyed the feeling. Many Akari might have, but Jinsai wasn't an Akari. Loss of control wasn't something he enjoyed, physical power didn't seem to be either. Rather instead she frowned slightly, and said nothing as he pulled her close to him and she rest her head against his chest. She did her best to hide a wince when he held her like this, his hand over the bandaging around her head where she'd been injured during their fight when he'd transformed into that beast. She still had a fairly nasty gash on her head from the fight that she'd bandaged herself that she hoped he wouldn't blame himself for, in truth she really hoped he wouldn't even notice it. She still had a headache from it, a dull throbbing ache that was renewed at the touch but she tried to hide.

He mentioned asking for her help and she nodded slightly. "Okay." she answered quietly. "I'm here for whatever help you need." she added. She was just glad that she seemed to have been successful in one thing at least. He no longer seemed to be intent on hiding or shying away from his new power. He seemed more accepting of it. To her, that was success enough.

She lifted her head off his chest a bit to look at him and smiled, leaning forward to kiss him gently on the lips.

[TyDie]

It seemed that, while Masako wasn't necessarily happy with what he had to say to her or how he said it, she at least understood that he couldn't approach this issue of his like an Akari, or even like a Fukusha. If it wasn't abundantly clear by now, Jinsai wasn't the poster child of his clan, and he abhorred the more brutal ways of the Akari clan. No, his proper demeanor prevented himself from enjoying that change, he wouldn't allow himself to take pleasure in it. If he lost himself to this... he would be no better than the bitch who devoured his brother.

But she accepted, and a smile crossed his face as she leaned into him. Maybe this really would work out in the end... Masako leaned forward to kiss him, and he happily leaned into it, returning her kiss for a few brief moments as he held her tight. When he pulled away a few seconds later, he let out a content sigh as his mind slowly returned to normal. "You can start helping by doing what you were about to do before I stopped you. Well... Assuming you can manage." As he finished, his hand lightly brushed against the bandage on her head. He didn't remember it, but some part of him knew that he had done that during his change. "I'm sorry about that..."

[Willoria]

She was glad he had let her kiss him, unsure if he would let her for a moment. Though the two were clearly close, kissing wasn't a common thing between the pair. She sighed quietly as he brushed a hand against the bandage on her head, smiling at him a moment and shaking her head slightly. "Don't worry about it." she tried to assure him. "I've had worse, and besides, if you did remember it, you'd remember I actually had a bit of fun since I didn't have to hold back." She hoped he'd find some amusement in it at least, but also knew since he wasn't a fan of brutal methods he might not be amused at all. Either way, once she could she slid off the bed to set up another stick of incense for aromatherapy to try and help Jinsai relax before getting the ointments again.

When she went back to the bed she tried to prod him into sitting up better so she could slide between him and the headboard. She sat down and helped him lean back against her before taking some of one of the ointments in her hands and starting to massage it into his shoulders gently. Masako did her best to be gentle, knowing how sore he probably was. As she did she rested her head against the side of his head, inadvertently breathing against his ear. She periodically kissed against the side of head as she worked. "I can't believe you held back against me the first time we sparred." she finally said, smirking slightly. "You didn't even like me then... and you still held back."

[TyDie]

Jinsai simply rolled his eyes at the notion of having 'fun' fighting against his more bestial half. In some way he was glad that she wasn't completely disgusted by that side of him. After all, he knew he was, and he wasn't sure he could stomach it if she felt the same. But on the other hand, he wasn't someone who took pleasure in the fight, and he couldn't really empathize with that either. Combat was a means to an end for him, a career choice, and one that he had absolutely doubted in the past despite his bloodline. It was never about enjoyment for him, and that was no doubt where a lot of his animosity with the Akari clan came from. It was rare to see an Akari with his morals and mindset reach an age in the double digits...

As Masako set everything up and scooched in behind him, she began to rub ointments into his body, earning a few winces of pain but nothing serious. In fact, even the slight twinges of pain felt good ultimately - Pain was better than numb for him. At least he knew he could feel. The kisses against his head, the rubbing of his body, all of these things caused slight moans to rise from his throat. It wasn't a sexual thing, basically no different from a romantic massage, but it still felt incredible.

He chuckled slightly as she realized his secret, feeling a slight bit embarrassed as she commented. "Yeah... Yeah I did. Whether I liked you or not, you're an ally of Iwagakure. I've never been able to justify serious violence with my peers, I go hard enough to train properly and that's it. I reserve that side of myself for those who deserve it. But now, I suppose I may not always have that choice. Whether I was aware or not, I don't think I could bring myself to hold back with that inferno of hatred inside me."

[Willoria]

Masako nuzzled against the side of his head gently, chuckling as Jinsai admitted to taking it easy on her. "Well in the future... I can handle it, especially if I have my shiin up. It's like armor, most of what you do isn't going to be able to pierce it." she told him, leaning forward to kiss his neck gently before pausing in the massage to simply wrap her arms around his neck and resting her hands on his chest. She sighed as she simply held him for a moment, breathing against his neck. "You know I care about you, don't you?" she asked simply. "I want to help you in any way I can just... don't shut me out, Jin." she sighed again, silently hoping that today had at least been enough to keep the man from shutting down the way he had after the mission again. Locking himself away, refusing to see her, it had scared her.

She finally slipped out from behind him so she could face him again, reaching out a hand to touch his face gently. She found herself suddenly unsure what to say, and instead she shifted to a better position to put ointment on the muscles on his chest. With one leg on either side of him she was careful not to put any actual weight on his lap because of how sore she knew his legs probably were, her hands moving across his pectorals and his shoulders from the front now. Periodically her eyes flitted to his to gauge his reactions, watching for signs of pain.

[TyDie]

Jinsai let out a wry chuckle as the woman said that she could handle him going all out... The thing is, it was never about that for him. He had no doubt that she could hold her own, but he didn't want to be responsible for a horrible mistake. Now, however, it seemed he may not have the choice... He'd simply have to trust that what she said was true. "Hmmm... I suppose I have to believe that if we're to keep being together, as allies... or as partners." Jinsai hadn't ever really said that word in reference to Masako, and yet as the word passed his lips, it didn't feel wrong to say either. In fact, some part of him liked it...

As she moved out from behind him, he grunted and winced with pain as he leaned back against the back board of his bed. She got on top of him now, rubbing the ointments into his chest and shoulders, and his eyes fluttered with a mixture of pain and pleasure. Her weight on his body did hurt slightly due to his soreness, but he was beginning to feel better. He took in a deep breath, enjoying the scent of the aromatherapy the woman had set up, along with her own scent. "You don't have to do this, you know. You always have the right to refuse..." In truth, he didn't want her to stop. He wanted her to stay with him. But even after all she had said and done, he needed to hear one more time that this is what she wanted.

[Willoria]

Masako gave a small smile as she worked the ointments into his shoulders and his collarbone, pausing for a moment as he pointed out that she could stop if he wanted to. She brought two fingers up under his chin for a moment again before leaning forward to kiss him lightly on the lips. "I'm not going anywhere." she told him quietly. "I'm exactly where I want to be." she added, shaking her head briefly before she went back to massaging the ointment into his upper arms as well with a light smirk on her face as she worked.

"Or was my lack of underwear not a clear enough indication for you, Jin?"

Of course she couldn't help the comment, knowing the way she was dressed couldn't have escaped his notice no matter how sore he was. Once she was done with the ointments she took a simple cloth to wipe her hands clean of any remaining ointment before looking at Jin again. "How are you feeling?"