Out of Many Kunai, One

[Joker]

It was always difficult, moments like this. The skies were overcast, the air was muggy, and humid; it felt like it was sticking to him even though the temperatures had yet to climb all too high.

It was just somewhat uncomfortable, his hand brushed over a series of names that were on the memorial, in the shape of a kunai. At the end of the day, Shinobi were those who endured, and the entire village had endured far far too much. Many of these names were those who had come long before, but the amount of new names on there were staggering. Some he’d gone to school with, some he’d eaten alongside, drank alongside, fought alongside with. Some had once been friends.

And one had been the one to bring him into this world.

It was a strange feeling, that hollowness as his fingers lingered on the carved name, simply a name. There hadn’t been a body, so only a name remained; so it became easy to forget. He could go through his days without thinking about the fact there wouldn’t be someone to greet him at his door, or nag him whenever he was being an asshole. That he’d see that smi-

”Tch. So depressing.” He chided himself, he was wasting time, and yet his feet refused to move, to turn around. He was stuck there. ”Haaa…I’ve gotta do more.”

[TyDie]

The dim gray sky overhead set the tone for what the day would hold in store for the young spider known as Aiya. The air clung to her and threatened to weigh her down with it's added weight... Or at least, that's what she fooled herself into thinking. The weight on her shoulders had nothing to do with the humidity, and deep down she knew that. No, this was the weight of grief and mourning. Behind her, her raven black hair was kept in a neat ponytail, lightly swaying back and forth as she made her way to the monument of the fallen. In her hands, she held a small bouquet of white flowers - Lilies, to be precise. A flower known for it's prominence in funeral ceremonies. Her usual attire was replaced with a somewhat tight fitting black dress that covered her entire body and a simple pair of black boots. The dress fell down to about mid knee, and had short sleeves coming down to her elbows, but otherwise it concealed most of her body, even the fuuinjutsu on her back that she relied on for so much of her shinobi life. But that was okay, because in this moment of sorrow, Aiya was not a shinobi - She was just another person lamenting the loss of a loved one.

As she neared the monument, she found that she was not alone in her quest to pay respects to the fallen. A blonde haired man with golden eyes stood before the large Kunai shaped stone, his finger resting on a name. She closed her eyes for a moment, remembering a moment not too long ago when she was locked in place just as he was... "Excuse me." The words flowed with the light breeze that gently blew through the clearing, more of a breath than actual words. Light enough to be unintrusive, but audible enough to catch attention. "I hope I'm not interrupting your... respects." The girl paused a moment, not wanting to be too blunt with her phrasing. She'd approach the man now, standing to his right as she faced the monument alongside him.

"It feels like only yesterday... So many names have been added to this damn stone." She held the flowers in front of her chest as she spoke, looking down to the petals as her thoughts drifted to those she lost.

[Joker]

Raizou heard the voice behind him, his hand shot back as if flinching away from the stone, the name itself. His hand found itself snuggly tied away back in his pocket as he looked over his shoulder, someone else was here to pay their respects. He felt something bubble up in his guts for a moment, it was a vile feeling. An annoyance at this interruption, but he fought it back down, he wasn’t the only one going through something.

Everyone was.

He released a slow breath, his golden eyes hovered over the flowers and then back to the stone. ”You’re not interrupting anything.” He lied, but then again sulking on his own really never suited him. From what he could tell, he was the older of the two of them to begin with.

”It sure does suck.” He said as he looked over it, his sensei, his teammates, his parent, all of them were on here. ”At least they have more company on the other side.” He tried to fill his voice with mirth, but it came out hollow.

He didn’t need to ask if they had lost anyone, not at all. ”Who’d you lose?” He asked, talking always made it better, or that’s what his old man tried to convince him of, maybe he could offer a hand somewhere in the process. He’d been here before.

[TyDie]

Aiya hadn't meant to startle the man, but she quickly realized it wasn't that he was scared, it was just that he didn't want anyone else to see him in mourning like this. It was an embarrassed reaction, but he seemed to recover from it well enough that she didn't feel she was imposing too much. His confirmation of that earned only a small nod and a smile as she approached the monument, listening to him as she continued to look down at her lilies. "Yeah... Suck. That's one way to put it I suppose." She said, almost as if she was speaking to herself. His comment about having company on the other side rubbed a little raw, but she paused before she reacted - Everyone had their own ways of coping with death. Who was she to deny someone's humor, however dark or dry it might be, if it helped them heal?

"I lost the same people you lost." She spoke with what she felt was a tone of wisdom, pointing out that every Konoha citizen that died was a loss for them. "But personally... My father. I didn't even know he was gone until after the battle was over. He was on another side of the field, he was all smiles before the fight too... Wanted to take me out to my first bar when we got back." She chuckled a little to herself as she reminisced, a tear silently working its way down her cheek. A quiet sniffle accompanied the tear after a while as she reached up to wipe away the tear. "Once the battle was over, I went looking for him, and suddenly he was just... gone. Just like that, another name on the KIA list."

She sniffed again, reaching one of her hands into the bouquet in front of her before splitting the bouquet, offering some of her flowers to Raizou. "I'm Aiya, by the way. Ibakuro, Aiya. Here, you can offer these if you like." She extended the hand full of flowers almost as if she was extending a handshake, a gesture of friendship and comradery as much as it was a gesture of mourning and grief. "How about you? What's your name and... Who did you lose?" She asked quietly.

[Joker]

”Can’t imagine how that felt, but you aren’t grieving alone.” Ibakuro, he knew of the clan, as a resident and shinobi of Konoha. It wasn’t easy, it was always a tragedy when the bright youthful eyes of a member of that clan was broken by the cruelties of their world. ”Even now.”

Raizou's gaze lingered upon the bouquet offered to him, its vibrant hues contrasting against the somber backdrop of their surroundings. With a gentle touch, he accepted the flowers, feeling their delicate petals beneath his fingertips, yet another of his hands clasped over those of Aiya’s.”We lost the same people, right? Let’s offer ‘em together.” e murmured, his voice soft yet resolute. With a solemn nod, he released Aiya's hand, his gaze drifting back to the monument looming before them.

”Plus, you had it rougher than me. Lost my Mum, but I was pretty far away at the time, not like we were all that close anyway. I didn’t realize until well after the fact.” He’d alienated a lot of people in the last ten or so years after all. Half of them were now dead, and the other half he couldn’t face, so here he stood.

”Awai Raizou, sorry ‘bout not introducing myself sooner.” His voice was even, measured. He extended the bouquet towards the monument, a silent tribute to those they had lost. Yet, even as he made the gesture, a part of him recoiled, haunted by the nagging doubt that his offering was not truly his own. A dark voice in the deepest, most self hating parts of his mind wanted to let go of the bouquet to not be faced with that fact.

Cowardice, he mused bitterly, was a trait he knew all too well. It whispered cruelly in the recesses of his mind, reminding him of his failures and shortcomings. And in moments like these, when faced with the raw emotions of grief and loss, he found himself retreating into the safety of his own insecurities.

"You ever wonder why they did it? Got into this life, and then left it so fast?"

[TyDie]

Aiya nodded in solace as the Man, introducing himself as Raizou of the Awai clan, stood in mutual support with her over their lost ones. As the man moved to set the lilies on the monument, Aiya knelt down on her knees and placed her bouquet at the base of the stone, resting it gently against the monument itself. Once they were in place, she'd continue to kneel, eyes closed in thought as she remembered her father, Kazuo. "I don't think anyone has had it rougher, Raizou. I think we're suffering equally right now, and to put one's hurt above anyone else's can blind you to the plights of others." Aiya rested her palms on the stone and fell into a deep bow, almost resting her head on the ground before rising up to a kneeling position again.

"I can't let myself be so selfish... But it hurts." She *wanted* to say she had it the worst. That her pain was the strongest pain anyone had ever felt, to simply let go and accept all of the pity and support, to let herself be vulnerable for once. But she just couldn't pretend that she was the only one who had lost a loved one... Raizou's mother was still her ally, her loss was just as painful as her father's was. She finally stood back to her feet, looking down at the lilies as she let out a small sigh.

"Do I wonder? It wasn't their choice to start these wars, they just did their jobs to the bitter end. And what did that get them? Not a god damn thing! I don't wonder why they left us, I wonder if they would've chosen to be shinobi if they knew where they'd end up!" She hadn't even realized that her fist was clenched tight, so much that you could almost hear the tensing of her muscles. She was angry- At Iwa for starting this shit storm, at Konoha for putting their lives on the line, and at the world for seeing fit to take her father from her. She wanted to lash out at the nearest solid object and smash it to pieces, truth be told... Maybe if she destroyed the monument, no one else would have to die? No where to put the names, that meant they could stay safe, right?

No... childish flights of fancy, and she knew far better now. Her hand slowly released and fell limp, her eyes turning almost soulless as all zeal and motivation left her. She felt defeated, helpless... "I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to see that." She said, an even, callous tone leaving her throat where once spirit and fury had been.