Arashiyama Ookurikara

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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by ShinobiTruth » Sun Aug 18, 2019 2:14 am

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Arashiyama Ookurikara a.k.a "Ookuri"
INFO
Age: 17
Gndr.: Male
Ht.: 6'0"
Wt.: 170 lbs.
Comp.: (0/1)
Vlg.:
Kumo
Rank: Genin
P. Affin:
Storm
STATS
Ninjutsu: 10
Taijutsu: 3
Genjutsu: 3
Stamina: 3
Control: 10
Strength: 3
Speed: 3
Instinct: 5
People say we've all got a destiny... Is mine to always fail?

Table of Contents
1. Appearance
2. Personality
3. History
4. Battle Information (Equipment, Abilities, Concentrations)
5. Jutsu Arsenal


Appearance
Village/Training Attire

Mission Attire

Face/Head:Save for one specific quality, Ookurikara shares the strong phenotype of the Arashiyama namesake: darker skin in comparison to the majority of his fellow villagers and light brown eyes. The one trait where he differs is in his hair, which is dark brown with a reddish tinge as it grows out longer. This is not hair-dye; rather, it is an expression of his abnormal chakra mutation he was born with.
Body:Though he is tall, Ookurikara is not very physically imposing. Though he has good physical structure, much of his muscle is unrefined and untrained, his body's musculature presently unassuming. Many would assume that Ookurikara is more fit for running than for combat based on physical appearance alone.
Notable Features:Other than the various physical traits that identify him as an Arashiyama, Ookurikara has a dragon tattoo that wraps up around his left arm and leads to his back. The majority of the tattoo is hidden by his clothing, though a small portion of his tattoo can be seen peeking out from underneath his coat on his wrist.
Clothing/Accesories (Casual/Village Attire):While in the village, Ookurikara prefers to wear a simply gray and black jogging suit with red accents, a white t-shirt, and gray and red tennis shoes that match his jogging suit. The sleeves on his jogging suit jacket are shorter, allowing his dragon tattoo to be more easily seen. Around his neck, he wears a pendant.
Clothing/Accessories (Mission Attire):Though Ookurikara sports a simple white t-shirt and a pendant on missions as well, that's about the only similarity between his village attire and mission/training attire. Instead, he wears a black reinforced jacket with brass accents and buttons and red lining, the sleeves folded up and clipped to the elbows, matched by the relaxed military slacks on his legs and the black combat shoes on his feet. Around his waist he wears a traditional kusazari with traditional armor platting to protect the groin and top of the legs along with a purple sash and red sarong with golden borders and tassels.

Personality
General Personality:For as devilishly attractive as he is, and for as easy-going and prominent as the Arashiyama clan is, Ookurikara is a young man of particularly low self-esteem. Though he has worked hard to be as great of a ninja as he can be, he often has unrealistic expectations of his own self. The vast majority of his classmates have qualified to become chuunin, yet he still lags behind. This apparent ineptitude frustrates and depresses Ookurikara. He often questions his own intelligence and ability, seeing how what his constituents find to be very easy he himself struggles to consistently execute. In his self-contempt, he's neglected to have a full examination of himself, preventing him from realizing his troubles were actually linked to a quirk of his own nature, a hidden gift that also presently serves as a double-edged sword. All in all, he's a young man of great potential, held back by the cripplingly negative and harsh view he has of himself.
Hopes/Dreams:Ookurikara's dreams are not big. Right now, he simply wishes to be useful, to do something truly great and lasting for his village. In a time of unprecedented change and potential, he clings to what he prays isn't just some unrealistic, futile hope for the future.
Fears:Ookurikara's greatest fear is that he truly has no real potential. He dreads the idea that his presently hindered capacity for growth is a lifelong chain that will forever bind him, and that his contributions to the village he loves with all his heart will amount to little more than platitudes and paltry errands.
Combat Mentality:As he struggles with a weak constitution at the present, Ookurikara's strategy is pretty basic. Bombard it from far away with Ninjutsu until it stops moving or dies. While he's not inflexible, Ookurikara structured his jutsu arsenal around his strengths, not his weaknesses, and prefers the mid to long range combat ranges of most ninjutsu focused shinobi.


History


H
I
S
T
O
R
Y


Since the beginning of time, Bōkyaku has existed. Ruling as the Guardian of Oblivion, he has watched creation expand and grow, and he has served faithfully as its counterbalance. All creation is finite. All things fade into nothingness. Entropy and the Void consume all. As such Bōkyaku makes it a point to avoid contact with creation, only visible to the souls so hopelessly judged and damned that they do not enter reincarnation, instead facing absolute death and destruction by his hand. Yet, despite his solitary nature, Bōkyaku has a great fondness for humankind. Every so often, when it suits his fancy, he reaches out and grants a human the tiniest shard of his power. For the first time in ten millennia, Bōkyaku bestowed the powers of the Void to another. That someone was the unborn Arashiyama, oblivious as he slept in his mother’s womb, awaiting his introduction into the world.

Ookurikara was born to the head family of the Arashiyama clan. Though in most cases the Arashiyama are fairly-easygoing people, Ookurikara's family held a consistent history of producing fine shinobi for the village. This tradition into which Ookurikara was born would prove to be a thorn in his side even from childhood. Ookurikara was born with mutated tenketsu and chakra gates, which while so intrinsic that they evaded the notice of medical professionals, inhibited his ability to properly mold chakra. Hence, while his siblings before him often excelled or at least were adept at the things they were taught even before they entered into the academy, Ookurikara clearly lagged behind. This frustrated his father to no end, filled his mother with worry, and dealt serious, consistent blows to the boy's self-esteem and confidence. Even when working twice as hard, Ookurikara only managed the most basic of competency in his lessons and struggled even with that. It was with a great sense of trepidation and an admittedly begrudging sense of obligation that Ookurikara entered into the academy.

His struggles continued there, and though he had the full support of the instructors there, his schooling was difficult to say the least. He was smart and had a solid strategic mind, but what his mind sought to do his body resisted, and while he successfully graduated, his abilities for one having practically been personally tutored by over half of the instructors in the school were average, at best. Eager to try and prove himself Ookurikara took as many missions as he could, pushing himself to do his best at each one. Though his earnest nature was commendable, his efforts garnered him with both the highest number of low-rank missions taken in his class... and the greatest percentage of mission failures out of any shinobi in the last decade. Now, three years after graduation, while he has watched many of his classmates ascend to chuunin, he has continued to try and catch up, without success. Though he still currently serves as a shinobi, his spirit is almost completely crushed, and he is on the cusp of resigning as a shinobi.


H
I
S
T
O
R
Y



Battle Information
Equipment List:

• 15 Throwing Kunai
• 15 Shuriken
• 10 Exploding Kunai (inscription for tag etched onto medium-sized kunai)
• 3 Smoking Shuriken (inscription for smoke bomb etched onto medium-sized shuriken)
• 2 Light Grenades
• 1 Katana with scabbard.
First AbilityRanton Affinity
Ranton [Storm Release] is a unique elemental affinity exclusive to the Arashiyama clan. By mixing their natural affinities for Raiton [Lightning Release] and Suiton [Water Release] the clan is able to create a liquid-like plasma called Storm.
Ranton:
Ranton Affinity
Ranton [Storm Release] is a unique elemental affinity exclusive to the Arashiyama clan. By mixing their natural affinities for Raiton [Lightning Release] and Suiton [Water Release] the clan is able to create a liquid-like plasma called Storm.
Ranton Passive: SplashingShow
Ranton has a splashing nature, which causes it to break into ribbons on impact, and distribute over an area. Ranton splashes on impact and breaks into X number of ribbons with X strength, where X is equal to 1/2 the strength of the jutsu(rounded up) and distributes over an area of Y meters, where Y is equal to 1/4th the speed of the jutsu (rounded up). These ribbons retain the effect of their original jutsu, so a Ranton jutsu used to pierce would create ribbons that stab and pierce anything they strike, while a Ranton jutsu that is wrap would create ribbons that wrap. Like Raiton, Ranton jutsu are electrical, and cause nerve damage on contact base on the ninjutsu requirement for the jutsu, seen below:
  • 1-14 Strength Requirement: Hair stands up.
  • 15-24 Strength Requirement: Tingling, acute numbness.
  • 25-34 Strength Requirement: Loss of Sensation.
  • 35+ Strength Requirement: Localized Paralysis.
First Ability
Second AbilityMukōton (Void Element)
Ookurikara was born with mutated tenketsu and chakra gates. Due to this abnormality, Ookurikara has the ability to access a highly abnormal type of chakra nature called Mukōton. Using the energy created from forcing together and separating Yin and Yang chakras, Mukōton has an interrupting effect, interfering with or stopping the natural flow of whatever technique, chakra source, or organism it attaches to. Whenever Mukōton chakra is infused with Ookurikara's techniques, it allows Ookurikara to impart a variety of anti-sensory properties onto his jutsu (silencing, invisibility, anti-chakra sense, etc.). If Mukōton chakra is imposed upon an opponent's technique, it interrupts and forcibly severs the connection between the opponent and their own jutsu, interrupting or outright removing their control over the technique, potentially causing the jutsu to be canceled out or terminated entirely. The potency of the interrupting passive is dependent on Ookurikara's Control stat. Mukōton chakra is naturally anti-sensory and cannot be sensed through any Chakra-based senses. Instead, the chakra causes an absolute black shimmer that thins and fades at its outer edges much like mist.

For character development purposes, Ookurikara does not currently have access to this ability.

A Ninjutsu Stat of 15 and Control Stat of 15 are required to unlock this ability.
Second Ability
Third AbilityUndiscovered at this time.Third Ability
Ninjutsu Concentrations (2/3)
Suiton:
Suiton Affinity
A character with this concentration is able to utilize Suiton, and can make and use any custom or archived jutsu that require the Suiton affinity. Suiton has a passive enveloping effect.
Suiton Passive: EnvelopingShow
Suiton's effect is enveloping, meaning that Suiton passively surrounds anything that it makes contact with. Suiton techniques that do not last over periods of time (i.e, exploding techniques) drench their opponents, but long term techniques will envelop anything they come in contact with and maintain a hold on it with the 3/4th strength of the technique, rounded down. This means that if a Suiton wave is shot forward with 17 strength, it will envelop and move anything with it that does not have more than 12 strength to resist it. This allows Suiton to fill a very powerful role in eliminating tools from opponent's access and capturing targets.
Raiton Affinity:
Raiton Affinity
A character with this concentration is able to utilize Raiton, and can make and use any custom or archived jutsu that require the Raiton affinity. Raiton has a shocking effect.
Raiton Passive: ShockingShow
Raiton has the effect of shocking, which means causes its effect to be diffuse upon impact. In organic material, this causes nervous stimulation which results in numbness, tingling, loss of sensation, and sometimes paralysis. In inorganic material, this means that the strength of the jutsu diffuses across an area 2x the size of the attack. In a jutsu that creates a lightning ball 2m in diameter, if it struck a wall the size of the attack would cover a 4m area.

Additionally, the strength of the nervous effect on organic material from Raiton jutsu is determined by the Ninjutsu stat requirement.
  • 1-14 Strength Requirement: Tingling, acute numbness.
  • 15-24 Strength Requirement: Loss of Sensation
  • 25-34 Strength Requirement: Localized Paralysis
  • 35+ Strength Requirement: Diffuse Paralysis
Taijutsu Concentrations (1/1)
Sword Weapons:
The fundamental skill of [Sword Weapons] indicates the user’s proficiency with swords and sword-like weapons such as knives, daggers, sword-breakers and the like. This facilitates their use of related Taijutsu.
Genjutsu Concentrations (0/1)[Place them here]

Jutsu Arsenal
NinjutsuShow
RantonShow
Ranton • Faint Starlight
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed seals, Ookurikara expels a stream of Storm chakra from their mouth at the opponent at 5 Speed and hits with 5 Strength up to 10 meters away. Upon impact, the liquid bursts into three spikes shooting downward for up to 1.25 meters into the surface or opponent they impacted at 5 Speed and hits with 3 Strength. Since this technique attacks the same target area twice, the second ribbons can potentially cause more damage than usual. Ookurikara can arc this stream over walls or barriers if he wishes.

Ranton • Rising Comet
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara forces a stream of Storm chakra down through the ground, targeting any single opponent within a 10-meter radius in any single direction from below at 4 Speed and hits with 6 Strength. Upon impact, this technique will spread out into three ribbons moving at 4 Speed and hits with 3 Strength in different directions for up to 1 meter, gouging into skin and tissue directly next to the point of impact if it hits.

Ranton • Celestial Oasis
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara can channel Storm chakra into any single source or mass of water he has created to convert it into an equal amount of Storm chakra, up to a 10-meter radius. While this can potentially end or weaken techniques that the water is currently being used for, this allows Ookurikara to cast up to three D-Rank Ranton jutsu or one C-Rank Ranton jutsu from any part of the converted Storm chakra for up to five posts or until exhausted. Any Storm chakra not used by the end of the duration will convert back into water.

Ranton • Comet Wave
C-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara forms a large wave of Storm chakra roughly 3 meters x 3 meters x 1 meter and sends it in a single direction for 10 meters anywhere within a 15-meter radius. The Storm wave moves at 10 Speed and hits with 10 Strength. Once it reaches its maximum distance or makes contact with an opponent, it splashes down, and each place where Storm chakra from this technique strikes forms two ribbons that move at 10 Speed and hitting with 5 Strength up to 2 meters away.

Ranton • Starcaller's Will
C-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara forms a large orb of Storm chakra roughly one meter in diameter and sends it five meters up into the air. The Storm chakra orb will remain for up to five posts or until used. With a single one-handed seal, Ookurikara can trigger the orb to attack the opponent in a large stream, moving at 8 Speed and hitting with 12 Strength. Upon impact, the liquid bursts into 6 ribbons on impact that lunge up to 2 meters away, moving at 8 Speed and hitting with 6 Strength.
RaitonShow
Raiton • Thunderclap Sigil
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara sends a pulse of Raiton chakra in the form of static electricity out from his body in a 10-meter radius around him at 5 Speed. This technique does not damage opponents nor does it apply Raiton's shocking passive. Instead, this technique imposes an electrical charge in the area that resonates with Ookurikara's own chakra. Future Raiton and Ranton techniques launched by Ookurikara at the opponent will have their Speed increased by 2 points until it exits the area. This electric charge lasts for five posts or until the opponent is hit by one of Ookurikara's techniques. Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will.

Raiton • Wyrmling Shock Breath
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara launches a 1 foot long bolt of lightning in the shape of a small dragon from his hand at the opponent with 6 Speed and with 4 Strength. On impact, this bolt applies Raiton's shocking passive.

Raiton • Burrowed Wyrmling Nest
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara channels a surge of Raiton chakra from his feet into the ground. The Raiton chakra burrows down into the earth and loops up to attack the opponent from any single direction beneath their feet within a 10-meter radius, moving with 5 Speed and striking with 5 Strength. This technique also applies Raiton's shocking passive.

Raiton • Spiked Tidal Wave
C-Rank Ninjutsu
Prerequisite(s): Suiton • Twisting Barricade.
While still expelling the water being used to form the Suiton • Twisting Barricade technique, Ookurikara forms the needed handseals to channel overlapping Raiton chakra into the water being released from his mouth, infusing the entire barricade with Raiton chakra. This causes any enemy or technique that comes into contact with the barrier to be struck with a shock of Raiton chakra with 10 Strength. This also causes the barricade to impose Raiton's shocking passive on any enemy or attack that touches it. This charge will remain on the barricade as long as it remains active.
SuitonShow
Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara draws water up from underground, the water seeping into the surface within a 15-meter radius of his person. For the next five posts, Ookurikara can cast Suiton or Ranton jutsu from any point within the waterlogged area. If Ookurikara uses Raiton • Thunderclap Sigil in the same area of effect as this technique, its range will be increased to match this technique's range. Any Suiton or Ranton jutsu cast within this area will have its Speed increased by 2 points until it exits the area. Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will.

Suiton • Liquid Chains
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, tendrils of water will erupt from the ground anywhere within a 10-meter radius at 5 Speed and attempt to envelop the opponent's arms with 5 Strength. If the opponent is caught in this technique, the water will attempt to pull the user down to the ground. This technique lasts for three posts.

Suiton • Wave of Subterfuge
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, a 3 meter x 3 meter x 1 meter wave of water will appear up to 10 meters away and move toward the opponent in a single direction. This wave moves at 4 Speed and strikes with 6 Strength. Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will.

Suiton • Twisting Barricade
C-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara expels water from his mouth to create a spinning wall of water, spiraling up and outwards with 10 Speed and 10 Strength in a 10 meter tall and two meter thick circular wall. The technique leaves a 5 meter space within the boundaries of the wall for the user and allies to move around freely. The water pressure from this jutsu can be used to defend against attacks and jutsu, and anyone caught in the water with a strength of less than 10 are trapped in the barricade. During the execution of this technique, Ookurikara is able to form handseals for other techniques if he so wishes. This barricade lasts for up to four posts, though Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will if he wishes.
Last edited by ShinobiTruth on Tue Sep 10, 2019 2:57 pm, edited 23 times in total.

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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by Director » Mon Aug 19, 2019 10:25 pm

Quote:
First Ability
I'm not sure why you're nerfing yourself with the unlock required. This sounds like a perfectly fine ability.
Quote:
Ranton
Ranton is an ability as its a fusion KKG.
Quote:
Ranton • Faint Starlight
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed seals, Ookurikara expels a stream of Storm chakra from their mouth at the opponent at 5 Speed and hits with 5 Strength up to ten meters away. Upon impact, the liquid bursts into three spikes shooting downward into the surface or opponent they impacted at 5 Speed and hits with 3 Strength. Since this technique attacks the same target area twice, the second ribbons can potentially cause more damage than usual. Ookurikara can arc this stream over walls or barriers if he wishes.
Be sure to mark the range of the ribbons as well. It'll be 1/4th the original speed.
Quote:
Ranton • Celestial Oasis
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara can channel Storm chakra into any single source or mass of water he has created to convert it into an equal amount of Storm chakra. While this can potentially end or weaken techniques that the water is currently being used for, this allows Ookurikara to cast up to three D-Rank Ranton jutsu or one C-Rank Ranton jutsu at lower chakra costs for up to five posts or until exhausted. Any Storm chakra not used by the end of the duration will convert back into water.
Without definitive chakra costs you shouldn't be able to reduce the costs. Instead make it so you can cast any Ranton jutsu from the body of water as if it originated from there. Also be sure to limit the range at which you can convert into Ranton. For a D-rank conversion jutsu, I think 10m is fair.
Quote:
Ranton • Comet Wave
C-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara forms a large orb of Storm Chakra roughly one meter in diameter and sends it up to five meters away. Once it reaches its maximum distance, it detonates with the force of two exploding tags, sending a small wave of Storm chakra in a conical area of effect up to fifteen meters away towards the opponent. The Storm wave moves at 10 Speed and hits with 10 Strength. Any opponent hit by this technique will be affected by Ranton’s splashing passive. Each place where Storm charkra from this technique strikes forms two ribbons that down into the point of impact, moving at 10 Speed and hitting with 5 Strength up to two meters away.
This jutsu's ribbons would form after the explosion, rather than explosion>splash>ribbons. It goes explosion>ribbons. Otherwise you're getting 2 explosive tags, then a 10 strength hit, and then your ribbons at 5 strength. So that's a three hit in one. Essentially two C-rank jutsu in one with a D-rank to follow, all for the cost of a C-rank.
Quote:
Raiton • Thunderclap Sigil
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara sends a pulse of Raiton chakra in the form of static electricity out from his body in a ten meter radius around him at 5 Speed. This technique does not damage opponents nor does it apply Raiton's shocking passive. Instead, this technique imposes an electrical charge on the opponent that resonates with Ookurikara's own chakra. Future Suiton, Raiton, and Ranton techniques launched by Ookurikara at the opponent will gain homing properties and increase in their Speed and Strength by 2 points. This electric charge lasts for three posts or until the opponent is hit by one of Ookurikara's techniques. If this technique is used in an area saturated by Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir, any of its graduated versions, or any similarly waterlogged area, this technique's Speed is increased by 5 points. Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will.
Imo homing should be C-rank, and this should only resonate with other raiton techniques or ranton. I don't see how suiton is attracted to this pull since it isn't electrically charged. Here are the rules for buffing your jutsu with another one. It'll be right above explosive techniques. Since this is an unfocused tech it'll only be 1/2 of the jutsu's strength that it's able to buff.
Quote:
Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara draws water up from underground, the water seeping into the surface within a ten meter radius of his person. For the next five posts, Ookurikara can cast up to three D-Rank Suiton or Ranton jutsu or one C-Rank Suiton or Ranton jutsu with lower chakra costs.
Same issue with the other one at reducing chakra costs. Also I'm not sure how this one also allows ranton and suiton? Should just be suiton as you're not infusing any ranton chakra. Make it fit like the other one, but this is exclusive to suiton.
Quote:
Suiton • Liquid Chains
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, gouts of water will erupt from the ground at 5 Speed and attempt to envelop the opponent's arms wtih 5 Strength. If this technique is used in an area saturated by Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir or any of its graduated versions, this technique's Speed and Strength are each increased by 2 points. This technique also applies Suiton's enveloping passive.
You cannot buff a jutsu within itself, the buffing has to be applied from an external technique. Also you don't have to say it applies the passive, its auto assumed elements do unless stated otherwise.
Quote:
Suiton • Wave of Subterfuge
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, a 3 meter x 3 meter x 1 meter wave of water will appear up to ten meters away and move toward the opponent in a single direction. This wave moves at 5 Speed and strikes with 5 Strength. If this technique is used in an area saturated by Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir or any of its graduated versions, this technique's Speed and Strength are each increased by 2 points. Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will.
Same issue with the other one having the buff within the technique and not in an external technique.
Quote:
Suiton • Twisting Barricade
C-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara expels water from his mouth to create a spinning wall of water, spiraling up and outwards with 10 Speed and 10 Strength in a ten meter tall and two meter thick cone with a five meter radius at the center. The water pressure from this jutsu can be used to defend against attacks and jutsu, and anyone caught in the water with a strength of less than 10 are trapped in the barricade. During the execution of this technique, Ookurikara is able to form handseals for other techniques if he so wishes. This barricade lasts for up to four posts, though Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will if he wishes. If this technique is used in an area saturated by Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir or any of its graduated versions, this technique's Speed and Strength are each increased by 4 points.
How its it a two meter thick cone, yet a five meter radius at the center? Do you mean a two meter thick wall? Also same issue as above buffing within the technique, needs to be an external buffing jutsu.

Ask me for an example of what a buffing jutsu for jutsu looks like. I can assist in building these techniques. I'll check your history once we work through the systems part.
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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by ShinobiTruth » Tue Aug 20, 2019 12:54 am

I believe I was able to edit everything to the proper specifications. Both of the jutsu that buff other techniques now only buff up to two points in Strength and Speed each, which is slightly less than half of the normal total stat pool (read: Strength) of jutsu for their respective ranks.

In regards to Mukōton, I’m doing it strictly for character development purposes. I know it’s not necessary, but it’s personally important for me to do it this way.

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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by WrightJustice » Tue Aug 20, 2019 2:42 pm

Raiton • Thunderclap Sigil <--- I'm not sure you need the bit about boosting by half, it should be fine just giving 2 strength and speed no matter what.

You should have a possible bit of an explanation of why his mutation occurred, perhaps a spirit passed through his mother or something when she was pregnant (I dunno, up to you really).


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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by WrightJustice » Wed Aug 21, 2019 10:24 am

1/2

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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by Director » Sun Sep 01, 2019 6:59 pm

Quote:
Suiton • Subterranean Reservoir
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, Ookurikara draws water up from underground, the water seeping into the surface within a 15-meter radius of his person. For the next five posts, Ookurikara can cast up to three D-Rank Suiton or Ranton jutsu or one C-Rank Suiton or Ranton jutsu from any point within the waterlogged area. If Ookurikara uses Raiton • Thunderclap Sigil in the same area of effect as this technique, its range will be increased to match this technique's range. Any Suiton or Ranton jutsu cast within this area will have its Speed increased by 2 points until it exits the area. Ookurikara can prematurely end this technique at will.

Suiton • Liquid Chains
D-Rank Ninjutsu
After making the needed handseals, gouts of water will erupt from the ground anywhere within a 10-meter radius at 5 Speed and attempt to envelop the opponent's arms with 5 Strength. If the opponent is caught in this technique, the water will attempt to pull the user down to the ground. This technique lasts for three posts.
For Subterranean Reservoir, you don't have to limit yourself for how many jutsu you can cast during its duration. You have until the post count is up to cast from any point. Also doesn't make sense that a suiton jutsu increases the range of a raiton.

Also I dunno what "gouts of water" means for Liquid Chains. Typo?
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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by ShinobiTruth » Sun Sep 01, 2019 9:06 pm

Edited for the first one. Going with the reasoning that water is generally a good conductor of electricity and because I can’t have the Raiton technique buff its own range.

Edited for the second. Gouts are essentially thick tendrils or tiny geysers? I changed the wording.

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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by Director » Sat Sep 07, 2019 10:37 pm

1/2
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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by Niro » Tue Sep 10, 2019 12:44 pm

Instead, it causes a slight transparent shimmer that can be perceived by opponents with an Instinct equal to or higher than Ookurikara's Control. <-Remove that. All attacks, even plasma/energy-based, have some form of visual indicator unless being affected by some outside jutsu. Sankaton is a cloud of dark red chakra, Denjiton is a dark gray wave of energy, etc
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NameVillageRankTeam
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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by Niro » Tue Sep 10, 2019 3:10 pm

1/2
#MakeIwaGreatAgain
NameVillageRankTeam
Tatsuo [color=#940839][b]IwaTsuchikageTeam 18 Jousai
Kinomichi [color=limegreen][b]IwaBanninJousai
Kotetsu [color=slategray][b]IwaGeninTeam 7
Ashura [color=coral][b]SunaGenin
Sai [color=#FF14A1][b]Kiri - MND-Rank
Yamato [color=#C71585][b]KiriA-Rank

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Arashiyama Ookurikara

Post by WrightJustice » Tue Sep 17, 2019 8:53 am

[ACCEPTED]

LOCKED

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