[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

User avatar
Shikon
Posts: 594
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2015 7:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Shikon » Fri Apr 28, 2017 5:16 am

Username: Shikon
Points: 0/0
Companions: (0/1)
Iyashuo, Hataki "If You Ever Fall, I'll Be There To Catch You"
The Guardian
General Information Age: 19
Gender: Male
Height: 5'9"
Weight: 158lbs
Rank: Chuunin
Village: Iwagakure no Sato
Chakra Affinities: Fuuton Battle Information
Stats:
  • Ninjutsu: 20
  • Taijutsu: 10
  • Genjutsu: 1
  • Stamina: 5
  • Control: 10
  • Strength: 9
  • Speed: 15
  • Instinct: 10
Equipment:

Strapped to Right Leg: X2 Tanto, 10" blades used for quick attacks

Hip Pouch:
  • x30 Kunai
  • x30 Shuriken
  • x15 Ground Caltrops
  • x15 Exploding tags
Left Leg Pouch:
  • 30 Senbon
  • 15 Kunai
Hidden in Sleeve Sheaths X2 Kunai

Hair: Brown
Eyes: Bright Blue
Physical Features:
Hataki has dark brown hair that reaches down to his chin. He keeps it clean and neat at all times making sure it looks acceptable. The style and look of his hair frames his face rather well, and the contrast to his pale skin makes him look younger then he really is. He has deep, bright blue eyes that is given more emphasis by his hair color. His eyes can often show his deep calming personality but if looked at closely hints at his aggressive and dangerous potential. Hataki has learned to use his eyes as a means to showing his thoughts and emotions, making anyone who were to make eye contact, almost able to read his mind.

Hataki wears deep black clothes at almost all times. He can be seen with a long sleeved shirt that has the sleeves rolled up just below his elbows. He has fitting black pants that are held by abelt Hataki's own design which bares the Iwagakure shinobi symbol on the buckle. On his feet are the standard shinobi sandals but in black instead of the normal dark blue. Hataki has a large weapon pouch that is strapped to his right hip for easy access. Also on his right leg there are two Tanto strapped for easy travel if needed. He carries other equipment in the pouch strapped to his left leg. His hands are typically covered by black gloves that strap on the wrists for a comfort fit. Each of these gloves also has a metal plate on the back for extra protection. He tends to wear a black bandanna that he ties his neck. He used to have this for when he was going on missions to hide his identity, for no one truly needs to know who he is at those times, beside his teammates. Despite that fact, he has grown attached to the article of attire, and he simply feels strange without it and thus will typically wear it daily. Hataki often wears many necklaces and other jewelry around his neck as part of his normal attire. Each of the small items mean nothing of any sort of sentimental value, but it keeps Hataki calm when listening to them clink and move while he travels.

Forehead Protector: Insignia carved into buckle of belt. Personality:
Hataki is a rather aloof sort of guy. While he can keep up a conversation rather easily, on nearly any topic, the shinobi's attention tends to wander about very quickly. Whenever speaking to someone, or performing a task, it is almost without fail that within ten minutes or so, the young shinobi's mind will drift to something else completely off topic. While this sort of attention span problem never really caused serious issues for Hataki in general, it does tend to get him into some tight spots on occasion, especially when it comes to women.

Often, Hataki enjoys being outside, and among the nature around him. He feels that most people have lost that connection with the natural world, and are far too cooped up inside their cities and villages. He can be often found out among the mountains in Iwa, watching the winds churn and spin about the area. He tends to spends hours at a time out there every so often when he can manage the time. It is one of the few respites that he currently has to remove himself and gain a perspective on his life and purpose.

Hataki does not like killing people, and usually will try not to do so. Though when the innocent or helpless are targeted, Hataki sees no fault, and feels no remorse for killing the evil that tried to commit the atrocity. Evil individuals are not worth the breath they breathe in Hataki's opinion, and such people are put down swiftly. The only second exception of course, are spiders. Any spider that Hataki has the opportunity to kill will be snuffed out as quickly and as loudly/frantically as humanly possible. All dirty spiders are killed like the shitty evil bastards that they are. Though, an otherwise good heart-ed individual, or confused soul is not someone Hataki will snuff out.

As a shinobi, and as a general rule of his character, Hataki never goes back on his word. Once he makes a promise, he will find a way to keep that promise. Anything within his power will be used in order to accomplish what he said. Hataki has yet to fail to keep his word as of now, and fully intends to ensure that is stays that way.

Further, Hataki has a strong protector persona, a big-brother mentality of sorts. Firstly, he overlooks his siblings lives and interaction carefully, making sure that they are never in danger, either from the people around them, or the world itself, and especially their father. Hataki sees himself as the only one who can really take care of his siblings, the only true parent they have, and thus devotes himself to their care. As a natural consequence, this mentality bleeds out to others around him. Hataki will gain a strong protective instinct over anyone who tends to be younger than himself, or weaker and in need of help. He will be the guardian protector to anyone no matter the danger that might be present. (Except for spiders, if they're being attacked by spiders, that fucker is on their own, deuces)

He will often go out of his way to assist those around him in the simplest of tasks. Opening jars, pulling things from shelves, carrying items for them. With a lecture for an academy students forever in his back pocket, and a strong left hook ready for any passing pervert, he is always ready for whatever situation he stumbles into. Hataki himself is a bit well known for his altruistic deeds. This sort of behavior will most likely be the cause to Hataki's inevitable end at some point in the future, but for now, Hataki is simply driven by his passion to help those who need it.

Lastly, while Hataki watches his siblings with a careful eye, and always looks to assist those around him, Hataki is rather lax when it comes to his own habits and putting himself in danger. He doesn't think twice about getting between some thugs, and while he does always have a plan and a strategy for a fight, the better plan could be argued to not fight in the first place. Hataki's biggest example to not thinking before acting is his tendancy to live with his heart out on his sleeve. He trusts anyone he first meets, and when coming across a pretty girl, will not waste time. This tends to end up bad for him, but when coupled with his optimistic attitude, Hataki bounces back rather quickly.

  • Hopes/Dreams: To Protect his siblings, and anyone who is weaker than himself, or simply in need.
  • Fears: Failing to save the people he cares about; Letting down his Sister or Brother; Fucking Spiders
  • Strengths: Unconditional Resolve/ Quick Thinker and Strategist;
  • Weaknesses: Deathly Afraid of Spiders/ Doesn't Know When To Quit/ Lives With His Heart On His Sleeve/ Short Attention Span

    Combat Style: Hataki is distance type of fighter, liking not to engage in close combat, or hand-to-hand grappling/Taijutsu. Although he is not terrible at such things, he is far more adept at fighting with some distance between himself and his opponent. He will tend to find a high elevation vantage point, letting him have a good view to survey the battle area as the fight goes on, and letting his analytical mind crunch through the calculations and come up with a plan. After all, hataki almost never goes into a fight without a plan, or secondary plan, or a contingency plan. He likes being always five moves ahead.
    Typically, Hataki will keep his distance, peppering his opponent with projectiles, leading them into a desired location with his barriers and Fuuton techniques, before making the final assault, or springing a trap. He will utilize his ninjutsu to control the battle field, and his sensory techniques to keep a "fixed eye" on all the players on the board. When fighting as part of a team, Hataki is usually the support player, helping out his teammate in anyway possible to ensure their victory.

    Specialization
Quote:
Ninjutsu Specialist
Having devoted their lives to mastering the arts of Ninjutsu, this Hataki is classified as a Ninjutsu Specialist. As a Ninjutsu specialist he is able to devote a total of 10 concentrations to Ninjutsu, unlike most people who are capped at 8. However, they are only able to devote a max of 5 concentrations to Taijutsu, and a max of 5 concentrations to Genjutsu.

As a Ninjutsu Specialist, Hataki is able to utilize Ninjutsu concentrations reserved for specialists, and is able to enter the God Tier [45+] on select stats, and meaning as a specialist they can select stats to break into the God tier. These stats can only be Ninjutsu, Speed, Control, and Instinct.
Abilities and Concentrations Abilities: [1/3]
Katougan: - Vortex EyeShow
The Katougan - or Vortex eye - is a unique kekkei genkei to Hataki, and an ability he uncovered during his academy years. Once activated, Hataki's pupils will change into a swirl pattern, taking on an appearance of a vortex just as the Doujutu's name describes. While used, the Katougan gives Hataki a "Fuuton" vision, layering translucent hues of color over moving air currents within his vision. Different hues showing varying speeds or pressures within the air. Further, it will "signal" or glow the areas of air that are being manipulated or infused with chakra, showing an activated or ongoing jutsu or ability that is changing the natural air around Hataki. Further jutsu can be used to augment the Katougan, as described in the utilized jutsu.
Regardless of the techniques Hataki's utilizes his Doujutsu for, or if he activates it for it's passive capabilities, he can only maintain its use for short periods. For Total Posts Equal to his [Ninjutsu+Control]/4, before he must turn it off. A cooldown time of 1/2 the activated post rounded down must occur until he can activate it again.
Requires: Fuuton, and Sensory Concentrations
Vision Range:
Control 1-10; 15 meters
Control 11-20; 30 meters
Control 21-30; 45 meters
Control 31-40; 60 meters
Control 41-50; 75 meters
Concentrations
Ninjutsu Concentrations:3/5
  • Fuuton
  • Iijutsu
  • Sensory
Taijutsu Concentrations:3/3
  • Perception
  • Projectile Weaponry
  • Upper Body
Genjutsu Concentrations:0/1

Jutsu
TaijutsuShow
General TaiShow
Taijutsu • Trained Nose]
Rank: D-Rank Discipline
Prerequisites: Perception Concentration
Description:
Through rigorous training and detailed application, Hataki has gained a heightened innate sense of smell. While he cannot smell any "better" than a normal person, he has learned to distinguish and differential the smells he does pick up, mentally isolating and focusing on the key scents and aromas. This allows him a keen advantage in various instances, and lets him track down a person or creature with moderate success, falling just behind Nin-dogs or Inuzuka in the rankings for sense of smell.

[Taijutsu • Subtle Tell]
Rank: D-Rank Discipline
Prerequisites: Perception Concentration; Instinct 10
Description:
With careful practice and experience, Hataki has learned to pick up on subtleties among normal mannerisms of a person's body. While watching a small enough crowd ( 20 or less people ), after a few minutes Hataki is able to pick out if someone inside the area is acting erratically. This is normally used to pick out someone trying to hide, or might be extremely intent or focused in preparation of an assassination. Though it is not entirely accurate to fault, as Hataki might simply notice someone who is late for work, or just really needs to pee. If someone is actively intending to hide their mannerisms, they can elude this technique given their Instinct stat is equal to or lower than Hataki's.

Taijutsu • Trail Hunting]
Rank: D-Rank Discipline
Prerequisites: Perception Concentration; Instinct 10
Description:
Having put a large focus on his specialty of tracking, Hataki has a intuition and keen eye for spotting and following the physical trails of his targets. As long as Hataki has a known starting location - or came to an end of a scent, chakra signature or other type of trail - and the target has passed through the area in a physical form, he can pick and begin following the trail his target left behind, be it a disturbance in the environment, a blood trail, or the target leaving behind grains of sand through a non-desert area (for example ). Hataki is successful should his Instinct be equal to or higher than the target [Instinct+Speed]/2. While following a trail in this manner, Hataki can only move at 3/4 speed.

Taijutsu • Locked Ear]
Rank: C-Rank Discipline
Prerequisites: Perception Concentration
Description:
A technique Hataki utilizes to eavesdrop on his target as he stalks them through a busy street, or if he is trying to get information before a capture/kill. Once he picked a target, Hataki is able to drown out the surrounding distractions and focus on a person/group of his choice. With a trained and keen ear, He is capable of listening in on a person and those directly around him despite what else may be going on in the area. Hataki is capable of listening in as long as he knows his target's location and is within a number of meters equal to his Instinct stat. While utilizing this technique, Hataki cannot move faster than 1/2 speed.
Flawless AimShow
Flawless Aim Style:
This style of combat is favored by specialists preferring to use projectiles, often serving as a staple for taijutsu-based projectile users. Focusing on the synergy between their hands and senses they strive to make their reach as far as possible with flawless aim.
Requires [Projectile Weaponry] and [Upper Body] concentrations
*[Flawless Aim Style • Arcing Shot]
D-Rank Taijutsu Maneuver
The practitioner is able to shoot in arcs up and over most obstacles, being able to accurately hit a target that is behind obstructions as if they were in the open. Granted, they must know of their target’s location or have another means of detecting them.

*[Flawless Aim Style • Tracking]
D-Rank Taijutsu Discipline
This allows the user to hit a moving target so long as it is moving in a way predictable to the user. They must still take into account travel time, and sudden changes in path will still affect the outcome.

*[Flawless Aim Style • Rapid Shot]
D-Rank Taijutsu Stance
The user will hold multiple projectiles in their hands to reduce the amount of time needed between each shot. When required they can quickly and fluidly draw more projectiles and keep up a steady stream of attacks. However, while utilizing this Stance the users feet must be planted, limiting the range of their assault, and their ability to be mobile while using it.

*[Flawless Aim Style • Evasive Maneuvers]
C-Rank Taijutsu Discipline
The user has learned to maintain accuracy while on the move. This allows the user to move at full speed and even change directions without interrupting their rhythm.

*[Flawless Aim Style • Hidden Shot]
C-Rank Taijutsu Maneuver
By releasing two projectiles back to back the user attempts to create a decoy for the second. The first projectile is often larger or of equal size and the second is slightly behind and below it, usually attempting to hide in the first’s shadow. This masks the attack to some degree. However, perceptive opponents who have an instinct greater than the user’s tai may be able to see through the charade, provided they have means to do so.
NinjutsuShow
NinpouShow
*[Ninjutsu • Chakra Burst]
D-Ranked Ninjutsu
After channeling chakra into one of their fists, the user will then attempt to strike their target and if successful, they will release additional concussive force in the form of an outward explosion at D-Rank force from their fist. If the user does not strike a target within 3 posts the jutsu dissipates.

*[Ninjutsu • Wall]
D-Ranked Ninjutsu
After performing the correct hand seals the user causes a thin 3x3 meter flat barrier to form directly in front of them at a speed of 5. This barrier can take a hit of up to 5 strength before shattering, otherwise it lasts for 3 posts.

*[Ninjutsu • Barrier]
C-Ranked Ninjutsu
After performing the correct hand seals the user forms a 10m3 barrier around a target up to 10m away from their position. The barrier forms at a speed of 12, has a strength of 8, and lasts 4 posts before fading away.
FuutonShow
Fuuton Affinity:
Fuuton Affinity
A character with this concentration is able to utilize Fuuton, and can make and use any custom or archived jutsu that require the Fuuton affinity. Fuuton has an cutting effect.
Passive (Cutting) Fuuton has a natural cutting property to it, that exists in all jutsu unless otherwise stated. This gives fuuton a unique opportunity to strike with additional power, and to act as a offensive defense. Regardless of their purpose fuuton jutsu passively cut with no distinct pattern at 1/3rd the strength of the technique rounded down unless otherwise stated. This means if someone punched a 19 strength fuuton wall, they would get cuts on their hand applied with 6 strength. This also means that fuuton jutsu specifically designated to cut things can create devastating wound by essentially striking twice.
*Fuuton • Wind Skating
D-Ranked Fuuton Jutsu
After performing the needed hand seals, the user is able to glide on air as if they were skating on ice. This allows them to move faster (+3 speed) but lowers their accuracy and agility (-3 Taijutsu). This doesn't allow them to fly, but rather to travel over things like land, water, and ice with greater ease. The user is only held several inches off of the ground. This Jutsu does not expire until the user’s chakra supply runs out or the user shuts it off. The fuuton passive is not applied in this technique.

*Fuuton • Redirection
D-Ranked Fuuton Jutsu
After performing the needed hand seals, the user covers a projectile they are holding in fuuton empowered wind. Then, when the weapon has been thrown as normal, the user is able to change it's direction by up to 90 degrees once with no drop in momentum on the projectiles part. This technique only lasts one post.

*Fuuton • Wind Bullet
D-Ranked Fuuton Jutsu
After performing the required hand seals, the user expels a basket ball sized ball of wind from their mouth. This ball of wind travels up to 20m at 5 speed, and explodes with the strength of a single explosive tag on contact with solid matter or at the end of its range.

*Fuuton • Gale Blade
C-Ranked Fuuton Jutsu
After forming the necessary hand seals, the user coats their weapon in a vortex of wind. This extends the weapon's range by 1m while not adding anything to its weight for 5 posts. It also causes the weapon to gain an edge as sharp as your average sword. This also applies the fuuton passive with a strength of 10 on contact with an opponent.
SensoryShow
Sensory:
Sensor
Sensors are shinobi who are able to activate a sixth sense which can locate and read chakra sources. Sensory is advantageous as it allows shinobi to perceive without using any of their conventional senses, which can easily be deceived. Sensors are able to collect a lot of information through the interpretation of this sixth sense.
Sensory Style • Thermometer
Rank: D - Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: Koutagan Ability
Description:
Hataki will utilize this technique to get a general understanding of how much heat an object or person is giving off without having to get too close. By forming a few seals and mixing a bit of his chakra into the air, he makes a connection with the wind currents around himself and analyzes the rise and movement around the target. This will give him rather accurate idea of how hot or cold something is within a limit of -20 C to 180 C +- 5-10 degrees or so of the true number. Any tempature higher, or lower than the given range will simply show at whichever extreme instead. He is capable of doing this simultaneously to multiple objects up to a number equal to his Control+Instinct/5, rounded down.

Sensory Style • Scent Notation
Rank: C - Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: Koutagan Ability
Description:
A particular jutsu Hataki created while experimenting with his Doujutsu. While having the Koutagan active he can perform a string of hand seals and begin sending small pulses of chakra to his eyes, stimulating the strange kekkei genkai. This allows Hataki's Doujutsu to pick up on the particles within the air currents within his vision, letting him see scent signatures in the air as he does the wind currents. The scented particles give off small but brightly colored wisps of air within their normal current, signalling a particular smell or aroma. If Hataki knows what particular scent he is looking for, this can be used to track down a person or object by smell, similar to a hunting dog tracking by smell.

*[Sensory Style • Beyond Senses]
C-Rank Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: Ninjutsu/Control/Instinct stats of 10
This sensor jutsu is used by shinobi to feel chakra sources within a radius of 25 meters. While this jutsu is fairly helpful in sensing chakra, it is unable to actually pinpoint specific chakras outside of 10 feet. This only gives the Shinobi an idea of how many entities with chakra are present in their general area.

*[Sensory Style • Evaluation]
C-Rank Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: *[Sensory Style • Beyond Senses]
The sensor will activate their sensory jutsu, and then do an additional set of hand seals. By doing so, the user will be able to compare the “strength” of each source of chakra they are able to sense to each other. The “strength” of the individual is determined by the average of each person’s Stamina, Control and Strength stats. The user can determine who has more chakra strength than others, allowing them to pick out possible risks. This technique is not very reliable as a determining factor, however.

*[Sensory Style • [Target Lock]
C-Rank Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: *[Sensory Style • Beyond Senses]
The sensor will activate their sensory jutsu, and focus on one source of chakra they can sense. By doing an additional hand seal, and holding said hand seal, the user will be able to continue to sense that source of chakra, even if they are moving around, so long as they are holding the hand seal. If they, or the chakra source, moves out of range, the user will lose track of them.

*[Sensory Style • Gauge: Speed]
C-Rank Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: *[Sensory Style • [Target Lock]
After activating Target Lock, the user will do a second series of hand seals, releasing the single seal for target lock, and then recreate it once finishing the series of seals for the technique. Doing so, the user will know their targets speed with a deviation of 3 points. Meaning if their speed is 17, the user will know its within the range of 14 to 20.

Sensory Style • Chakra Tracking
Rank: B - Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: Koutagan Ability, *[Sensory Style • [Target Lock]
Description:
After having performed the needed seal and "locked" onto a person's chakra signature, Hataki is able to memorize that signature and notice any lingering chakra a locked target has left behind. This will allow him to track and follow a previously locked target that has escaped out of range, similar to tracking a ninja through the tradition style. A person's chakra signature will tend to only stick around for as long as the average physical trail though, and thus this technique cannot be used to track someone weeks after. Instead it is an alternate tracking option if the target was simply skilled enough not to leave a physical trail behind. Hataki cannot move faster than 1/2 speed while using this technique.
GenjutsuShow

History
Hataki's BioShow

Hataki was born into the village of Iwagakure in what could be said as, a bad time. When he was a child the anticipated hyper-active personality of the Iyashuo family blood in his veins did not show. Instead he was very clam and collective. He usually only sat and listened to the things around him. His father, Iyashuo Kensei ( Jounin at the time) was disappointed with his first born son. He expected, like everyone else, that Hataki would be more active and show great potential as a Shinobi. Instead Hatake would run off to the wilderness to lay on the grass taking in the surrounding area. Hataki seemed to be content with life as he had it so far, solitary, care free, and without the need of companionship. Sure his father seemed to slowly shun him entirely, but he did not mind it at the time. The young boy was not perturbed by his situation, and was in fact rather happy with it.

Though one day a new person came into his life, his brother, whom seemed to be the family legacy, being the hyper-active, ambitious, and strong willed kid that they anticipated Hataki to be. With his brother born Hataki's father started to focus his attention on grooming his second son into the shinobi he wanted as a child of the Iyashuo family. Hataki fell to the way-side, and as the years continued to go on, his father seemed be ignoring him almost completely. Hataki took that time to increase his nature expeditions. On many occasion Hatake was out in the forests taking in the area around him. This reluctance to be at home and chronic lonely behavior seemed to get worse as the days progressed. While his father ignored his first son to focus the grooming Amegaki - Hataki's younger sibling - the steady decline in Hataki's life did catch his father's attention, and his worry. All this behavior was seen as a very bad sign to Hataki's father. It did not take too much longer until his father decided that joining the Shinobi academy would get him to be the son and ninja that he was destined to be. He took Hataki down to the school and registered him as soon as possible.

Hataki did not change in his days as a student though. He usually only sat in class waiting for it be over. He did not like the unneeded work of the classroom. He found it worthless, tiresome, and annoying. He usually only slept during tests and other lectures. Though when Hataki did pay attention the teacher found hataki to be an incredibly fast learner, and picked up each lesson almost immediately. The various instructors attempted to get him more enthusiastic about being a shinobi, but nothing they said really meant anything to the young kid. After a while, the teachers merely gave up in their attempts, accepting that Hataki was just not the one to enjoy the shinobi life, and would be another sub-par ninja.

Even though the teachers seemed to give up on Hataki, the rest of the students didn't. Even after Hataki's many requests to be by himself, the other children continued to pester him into joining in their games. A student by the name of Kobayashi Reiko, was most persistent, her go getter attitude, and endless confidence - and slight over-agressive ways - seemed to eventually be effective. They finally broke him down and got the boy to have fun. With Reiko by his side, Hataki finally was able to get into the act of enjoying the company of others. The rest of the kids found Hatakt a fun person to be around, his perspective on things made their games only that more imaginative, and fun to play. With this, Hataki learned to socialize like a normal person. After these events the young boy's willingness to be a shinobi seemingly sky rocketed, and he started to push himself a bit to do the work, to focus more intently on the lessons and the training. By this time, and despite his vast intelligence, he only barely managed to squeak by on the final exams, as He got some of the lowest scores in his class. Even with Hataki's near wash out scores, the teachers knew that the little shinobi knew everything that was supposed too be taught. The teacher's kind spirit was really the only thing that let Hataki pass, the sensei only hoped he would get his act together later on.

Becoming a genin, Hataki seemed to disappoint his father even further. Despite the fact he put his best effort into the missions he was given, planning out the strategies to be used, and directing his teammates through the tasks and battles of each mission, he never was quite on the same level as the other genin. This caused conflict through the growing years with his dad. Hataki's father continued to try to push him even further, near the breaking point and always trying to get even more out of him. Though Hatake only fought harder against his father in return.

Almost every night it seemed they to were up in each others faces, screaming and yelling until their vocal cords were about to snap. At various moments Hataki was on the brink of being kicked from the house, though the boy's mom kept that from happening, she saw it best that Hataki stay for hissiblings, as Amegaki and Kurina had a very close bond to their older brother. Even then, the tensions never really died down and the fights would start again periodically around the time Hataki came back from a few missions.

Things only ever seemed to ease for Hataki at home once he discovered his real specialty as a shinobi. With his strange genetic lottery win, and his uniquely analytical and perceptive mind, the young shinobi was a natural at tracking and hunting operations. The genin could spot and follow trails as if it was second nature, and with his trump card in his back pocket - so to speak - the young boy never failed to complete the tasks. He started move forward ahead of his peers, and gain a bit of the limelight that his father always wanted him to step into. Even though this got his father off his back, it seemed to stir up a slight bit of trouble among his friends.

Reiko, his long time friend since the academy, also seemed to have a knack for tracking. While the two of them were fond of each other back in the learning years, the competitive nature of the shinobi world spurred them toward a heated rivalry. Hataki would make constant attempts to one-up his childhood friend, and he saw each of her successes as yet another challenge aimed towards himself. The drive and need to beat his new found rival was probably what pushed him towards buckling down and really omitting to his training, and veered him strongly toward the path of becoming a chuunin.

Hataki entered the chuunin exams a year or so after pushing into his focus in tracking techniques. The first few tests were rather easy, his intelligence let him get through the things that most other genin would have serious trouble with. Things got hard only about the times of the fighting rounds. Hataki didn't find any enjoyment in the fights, and his combat style made single one versus one set-ups rather difficult for him. Further, he didn't like the idea of having to fight his friends, or hurting any of them. He actually attempted to avoid the battles all together. Though once it seemed he had no choice in such a matter, Hataki was forced to turn against his fellow shinobi. His mental prowess was the only thing that gave him his edge, but he was sure that luck was somehow involved. Hataki managed to somehow get promoted soon after, he never questioned why, he was afraid of the answer.

Though in all honesty, Hataki didn't show the battle ability that most chuunin would need. But he did have the brain and the social skills to get certain missions done that others wouldn't be able to handle. The Jounin and shuunin proctors saw this ability that Hataki had, and saw fit to allow him the rank of chuunin for such tasks.

Once Hatake become promoted though, things did not get any better for him at home. While he did get the respect and admiration from his family that had been lacking for so long, unfortunate circumstances prevented good spirits. Not long after the Chuunin exams, his mother had fallen quite ill. Medical-Nin could do not more but ease the pain, as the disease was not a foreign one, and instead seemed to be something his mother's body was creating on its own. This left his mother bed ridden and in variable levels of pain, breaking down the family he had from the ground up. His siblings in the same depression he had, and with his father at his wits end. The Jounin retired his shinobi duties in an attempt to care for his mother, but found the task pushed him at his own limits. It wasn't long at all until Hataki's father started looking to alcohol to ease his own sufferings. The responsibility of parent to his younger siblings seemed to fall on his own shoulders.

With both parent's unfit, and his siblings running off against his better attempts to stop them, Hataki was left alone in the cold world of the Earth Country. But Hataki still had one goal, to keep his siblings alive. With this in mind, he changed himself almost entirely. No longer selfish, or unmotivated, the Chuunin became the parent and protector he needed to be. Providing for his family as well as he can with his shinobi work. Hataki keeps a constant eye out for his "kids" and making sure they stay out of trouble. This knew persona was well accepted with others in the village as well, as he took to treaing all of those in the village as his family, taking care whoever he can in whatever way possible. Upon becoming a yound man, Hataki seemed to usher into his prime.

Ramping up his shinobi work meant taking many more missions, and as a result, he began teaming up with Reiko much more often. With their genin days behind the both of them, she and Hataki seemed to fall into the old childhood friendship they had back in their academy days. And while their personalities seemd to differ greatly, the fact the girl found herself in trouble so often, Hataki can't help himself but stick around her if not to at least clean up her messes, and assist her when she needs a bit of guardianship.

Currently, Hataki seems to have his life under control, and afloat. Balancing his official duties and family life rather well. Though, as time passes, things might change, and further unfortunate events might befall him. For now, though Hataki feels confident he is strong enough to take care of whatever may come his way.

User avatar
Kabu
Posts: 8026
Joined: Thu May 09, 2013 8:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Kabu » Sun Apr 30, 2017 3:21 pm

First of all your Doujutsu makes no sense to me so I'm going to need you to please it explain it in more concise terms.

Secondly you still need to label any jutsu that are making use of it as Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, or Genjutsu.

You also need to remove the Personal Renown and Coupon sections.

Everything else should be fine.
NPCsShow
Shinsen Kyoko - #99840A
Kyomu Nozomi - #5960A8
Ibakuro Rin - #9E4FA5
Nakiya Hotaru - #9E540A
Nakano Kiyomi - #8E47AD], Nakano Ayaka - #0C1C8C
Fukusha Nezumi - #E00747
Karagata yamada - #CE1126, Makura Ayame - #7251BC
Kabu's Test Thread

User avatar
Shikon
Posts: 594
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2015 7:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Shikon » Mon May 01, 2017 8:06 am

Removed the Renown and Coupon lines, my bad there.

I edited the description of the Doujutsu, hopefully explaining it a bit better. Basically it simply lets him see varying speeds and pressure in the air around him, and alerts him of chakra infused air. Further jutsu can change this, but simply in ways that the jutsu itself describes.

As far as the techniques for the Doujutu goes, I don't know any way to make Tai/Genjutsu out of this, but I do have a few Ninjutsu already in the application. They are all under the "sensory" tag of Ninjutsu, and clearly state "Katougan Ability" in their Prerequisites.



User avatar
Kabu
Posts: 8026
Joined: Thu May 09, 2013 8:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Kabu » Tue May 02, 2017 12:33 am

It doesn't matter which section of the app they're located in.

All jutsu need to be labeled as something along the lines of X-Rank Ninjutsu, Genjutsu, Taijutsu
NPCsShow
Shinsen Kyoko - #99840A
Kyomu Nozomi - #5960A8
Ibakuro Rin - #9E4FA5
Nakiya Hotaru - #9E540A
Nakano Kiyomi - #8E47AD], Nakano Ayaka - #0C1C8C
Fukusha Nezumi - #E00747
Karagata yamada - #CE1126, Makura Ayame - #7251BC
Kabu's Test Thread

User avatar
Shikon
Posts: 594
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2015 7:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Shikon » Tue May 02, 2017 6:20 am

Kabu:
Tue May 02, 2017 5:33 am
It doesn't matter which section of the app they're located in.

All jutsu need to be labeled as something along the lines of X-Rank Ninjutsu, Genjutsu, Taijutsu
yes... that's why they are clearly labelled, under the jutsu section, where jutsu go.

I think there's some miscommunication going on here. Since it sounds to me like you're saying "remember, all jutsu you use this Doujutsu for need to be labeled by their type" and I'm saying "yes I know, they are labelled in their entries under the Ninjutsu tab. thus they are ninjutsu" So i'm confused on what your insistence on the jutsu labeling.

:-/

User avatar
Zangy
Posts: 29087
Joined: Sun Nov 23, 2008 7:00 pm
Contact:

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Zangy » Tue May 02, 2017 11:12 am

Jutsu need to be labeled, because a lot of times in actual threads, when you copy paste the jutsu, it'll look like this:
Quote:

Sensory Style • Thermometer
Rank: D
Prerequisites: Koutagan Ability
Description:
Hataki will utilize this technique to get a general understanding of how much heat an object or person is giving off without having to get too close. By forming a few seals and mixing a bit of his chakra into the air, he makes a connection with the wind currents around himself and analyzes the rise and movement around the target. This will give him rather accurate idea of how hot or cold something is within 10% or so of the exact number. He is capable of doing this simultaneously to multiple objects up to a number equal to his Control+Instinct/2, rounded down.
That doesn't show what type of jutsu it is, which is one of the few things that our jutsu template requires. This is especially needed due to the fact of different types of jutsu (See: Tenkujutsu) that don't follow the same rules.
CodingsShow
Oohazure: [color=#AFAD00][b]""[/b][/color]
Yumegokochi: [center][color=#79CDCD][font=Georgia][big][[sub][/sub]][/big][/font][/color][/center]
Okuure Daisuke: [b][color=#BA7CBC]""[/color][/b]
Kouseki Kazouchi: [b][color=#007D4F]""[/color][/b]

User avatar
Shikon
Posts: 594
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2015 7:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Shikon » Wed May 03, 2017 5:52 am

oooh. okay i understand now. my bad.


okay all tags added in.

User avatar
TyDie
Posts: 7403
Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2013 8:00 pm
Location: Manassas VA

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by TyDie » Sun May 07, 2017 3:02 pm

I don't see any issues

1/2
Active Characters
Village of OriginCharacter Name & LinkRankColor
Sunagakure no SatoHenrin EmiGenin[color=darkgoldenrod][b][/b][/color]
Konohagakure no SatoIbakuro AiyaChuunin[color=#8CD600][/color]
Sunagakure no SatoKouseki TakumaGenin[color=#003893][b][/b][/color], [b][color=#AFBCDB][/color][/b]
Kirigakure no SatoKazuki RyuChuunin[color=#dc143c][/color], [b][color=#C71585][/color][/b]
Iwagakure No SatoHiraku KenjiBannin S-Rank Missing Ninja[b][color=slategray][/color][/b]
Iwagakure No SatoFukusha JinsaiJounin[color=#BF0000][/color], [b][glow=orangered][color=#000000][/color][/glow][/b]

User avatar
Valkier
Posts: 3334
Joined: Sun Jan 04, 2015 7:00 pm
Location: U.K.

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Valkier » Sun May 14, 2017 9:32 am

You may have a broken bold tag at the beginning of your taijutsu spoiler somewhere - i'm not sure if it's intentional though? :)

Regarding the ability:
  • I feel like the duration to keep it active is far too high; already (at base chuunin) you can maintain it for 15 posts, which is really most of a thread and isn't therefore much of a limitation. Since you state it can only be used for short periods, I'd halve this duration to [Ninjutsu+Control]/4. /2 would have been fine in the old stat-15 system; now, however it's really long!
  • I feel like the ranges also begin a little high at 30m for 1-10 control. I'd prefer to see it scaled from something like 15m up to 70m, or something around those numbers that make a sensible progression.
Quote:
Sensory Style • Thermometer
Rank: D - Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: Koutagan Ability
Description:
Hataki will utilize this technique to get a general understanding of how much heat an object or person is giving off without having to get too close. By forming a few seals and mixing a bit of his chakra into the air, he makes a connection with the wind currents around himself and analyzes the rise and movement around the target. This will give him rather accurate idea of how hot or cold something is within 10% or so of the exact number. He is capable of doing this simultaneously to multiple objects up to a number equal to his Control+Instinct/2, rounded down.

Sensory Style • Scent Notation
Rank: C - Ninjutsu
Prerequisites: Koutagan Ability
Description:
A particular jutsu Kataki created while experimenting with his Doujutsu. While having the Katougan active he can perform a string of hand seals and begin sending small pulses of chakra to his eyes, stimulating the strange kekkei genkai. This allows Hataki's Doujutsu to pick up on the particles within the air currents within his vision, letting him see scent signatures in the air as he does the wind currents. If Hataki knows what particular scent he is looking for, this can be used to track down a person or object by smell, similar to a hunting dog tracking by smell.
I'm not sure how much I like these two... Being able to see air currents/pressures with your eye doesn't impart any super-accurate knowledge about temperatures or scents. For Thermometer, the technique sounds like you would be able to tell a relative temperature difference between two areas (i.e., your eye shows that this bit of air is rising quickly through the air around it, implying it's probably quite hot compared to the other air), but it shouldn't grant you the ability to immediately identify exact temperature degrees. A vague idea (to within 5~10C, maybe) might be passable. (Control+Inst.)/2 is again quite a vast number for this rank of tech, I would put it at /5 or so at this level.
For the Scent Notation technique - Your doujutsu doesn't give you the extreme level of magnification that would be needed to visualise scents. You could use your eyes to see where a scent is likely to be moving, if you know it's there, but seeing the particles is a no in my opinion.
Quote:
[Taijutsu • Lie Detector]
Rank: D-Rank Discipline
Prerequisites: Perception Concentration; Instinct 10
Description:
With careful practice and experience, Hataki has learned to pick up on subtleties among the pitch and tone of a persons voice throughout conversation, and the mannerisms of their body. After speaking with them for a minute or so, he is able to determine a baseline of sorts, and with this skill determine if the person's statements are said with the intent of deception. He is successful if his target's instinct is equal to or lower than his own, as long as they don't have specific skills/techniques allowing them to deceive with greater skill.
This one should be C-rank, imo.

CharactersShow
Aisu NaohiroJouninKirigakure no Sato[Unit 12] [HHD] [#BAE0E2] [#70CEE2]
Hachiya KotoriGeninIwagakure no Sato[Ukiyogenma Jinchuuriki] [H.N.K.][Gold] [#BF8040][Thread Tracker]

User avatar
Shikon
Posts: 594
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2015 7:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Shikon » Sun May 14, 2017 8:03 pm

edited ranges and duration for the Doujutsu.
Quote:
"A vague idea (to within 5~10C, maybe) might be passable. (Control+Inst.)/2 is again quite a vast number for this rank of tech, I would put it at /5 or so at this level."
Which is why the technique says plus or minus 10% in accuracy. I did changed the number of objects to /5 though.
Quote:
For the Scent Notation technique - Your doujutsu doesn't give you the extreme level of magnification that would be needed to visualise scents. You could use your eyes to see where a scent is likely to be moving, if you know it's there, but seeing the particles is a no in my opinion.
Added some more details in. He doesn't actually see the particles in question, only the small bits of scent they release.
Quote:
This one should be C-rank, imo.
I added a maximum Instinct number, so someone who has a number over that this jutsu wouldn't work on. Does that sound more reasonable?




Fixed that broken Tag in the Taijutsu section as well. Thanks. :)

User avatar
Kabu
Posts: 8026
Joined: Thu May 09, 2013 8:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Kabu » Tue May 16, 2017 5:37 pm

[Taijutsu • Lie Detector] <- Should still be C rank, reading people like this I don't think is really D rank level

Sensory Style • Thermometer <- I actually agree with valk on the numbers, rather than being a % it should be a specific range

Sensory Style • Scent Notation <- Don't really think that you should be seeing scents in any form with your Doujutsu being written as is
NPCsShow
Shinsen Kyoko - #99840A
Kyomu Nozomi - #5960A8
Ibakuro Rin - #9E4FA5
Nakiya Hotaru - #9E540A
Nakano Kiyomi - #8E47AD], Nakano Ayaka - #0C1C8C
Fukusha Nezumi - #E00747
Karagata yamada - #CE1126, Makura Ayame - #7251BC
Kabu's Test Thread

User avatar
Shikon
Posts: 594
Joined: Fri Feb 13, 2015 7:00 pm

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Shikon » Wed May 17, 2017 6:40 am

Edited Lie Detector to a different technique. Hopefully that one is D-Rank worthy. :(

Edited Thermometer to have a set range, while still having a small inaccuracy amount.

Scent Notation is trickier. The Doujutsu was written with this line - "Further jutsu can be used to augment the Katougan, as described in the utilized jutsu." For exactly this type of purpose. The jutsu simply lefts someone see the scents that linger on air currents, air currents which the Doujutsu lets the user already see. It's not at all complicated really. Do you want me to add in the stipulation of the technique not letting him "see" scents that would have already dispersed over a normal time frame and unable to be "smelled"? I think that might be where the hang up is. The jutsu doesn't at all let him see a scent that would have already be washed away or anything.

User avatar
CDF
Posts: 9159
Joined: Fri Jul 24, 2009 8:00 pm
Location: Like, everywhere, dude.

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by CDF » Tue May 23, 2017 11:52 am

Taijutsu • Trained Nose] <-- should have an effective range, so he's not isolating/recognizing smells past a certain distance

[Taijutsu • Subtle Tell] <--- I thin you meant equal or greater

Taijutsu • Trail Hunting]<-- I think this should mention that this doesn't work if the target used a technique to hide their movements.

Taijutsu • Locked Ear]<-- I'd like a cap on the range of this. Don't want a c-rank with a 50 meter range hearing selectivity. Also some note about noises that are loud enough won't be able to be ignored, such as yelling right next to you or noise attacks meant to cause pain
- zenchou
Most intense. Mission. EVER.
[color=#C9B037]Ouji Hito Kazekage[/color] Sunagakure no Sato
Wakatsuki, Zai A-ranked Missing Ninja Kumogakure no Sato

User avatar
Willoria
Posts: 12128
Joined: Fri Jul 31, 2009 8:00 pm
Location: Dancing with his Demons
User flair: Heart of Gold, Encased in Stone.
Contact:

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Willoria » Sun May 28, 2017 4:54 pm

2 days left on this...
The Tales of the Aes Sedai Fukusha Reina - Iwagakure No Sato - Jounin - #EF2B2D Atsushi Cho - Tea Country - D Rank Samurai - #A34402 Hanzo - Sunagakure No Sato - Genin - #35C4AF

User avatar
Director
Hokage
Hokage
Posts: 3518
Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2015 8:00 pm
Location: Before or after the explosion?
User flair: If you read this, you're gay.

[Denied]Iyashuo, Hataki

Post by Director » Fri Jun 02, 2017 8:51 pm

Denied

This application has been denied. Most often because the user requested or has taken too long to reply to the moderators. If you would like a nocode for this application, please notify a moderator and they can get it for you.
Character: Awai, Fanho | Rank: Hokage | Village: Konoha | Color Code: [b][color=#682860]
Character: Konshi, Yuichi | Rank: Jounin | Village: Kumogakure | Color Code: [b][color=#0051BA]

REPLY

Return to “Completed”

×