[Lonely] I'll Meet You in the Next

[Lunanana]

It was a day like any other, one of those she had to stay in the compound for yet another meeting. About nothing. A smile and wave meeting, be polite, just sit there, back straight, obedient, presentable. Years of training, learning, and yet, all in vain because she was never cut out to lead a clan. It gnawed at her for years not just in her own head but with nasty, off handed remarks made by some of the older members of the Hyuuga clan. Recently, her perspective changed, she had so much more to live for now – it was a vow, a promise, a goal and it made her see life for what it was truly worth. And yet, on a day like any other, life had other plans.

Tsuki’s eyes fluttered open, the morning sun gently waking her up from her sleep. She tossed and turned for just a while longer, eventually giving up on sleep due to a new development in her current condition. She barely made it to the restroom and once it was over, she slumped to the nearby mirror, lifting her head up and looking over herself. For days now keeping down food seemed almost impossible. Dark circles formed under her eyes, barely visible but noticeable on her pale skin. With a few things here and there, she covered them up, right before she had to revisit her earlier inconvenience again. For the first time during this time, she really thought that this was difficult. The weight of the responsibility laid heavily on her shoulders, she couldn’t deny it. And just for a brief moment, she caught a tear running down her cheek, before she quickly wiped it off and made sure to steady her breathing, washing her eyes with cold water to cover the redness. Nanami could walk in any second now, and she was not ready for any questions.

Just as she walked out and started making her way to the kitchen, one of the younger maids appeared just in front of her, inviting to follow with a polite nod. Tsuki nodded back, trailing the girl behind with an expressionless face. She heard the talks that flowed around the compound, how the heiress’s personality changed regarding the more official members of the clan, about a cold edge to her gaze, the way her voice turned monotonous. Brave to talk like that in a compound full of people with all seeing eyes. Even if the Byakuugan was not allowed in the compound, the Hyuuga had their ways to speak and understand what was between the lines. And so did she, yet, she was never the person to blame anyone for that. It was the truth. There was confidence in her now, a clear distinction, because she grew to a person she would run to as a child for safety. She felt the metal of the ring under folds of clothing, a constant reminder of hope and better days, and yet there was so much to still achieve.

She led her to the fitting room, Nanami not in sight. A few girls surrounded her, already changing her clothing and Tsuki felt a voice in her head screaming, begging to not touch her, to leave her alone, they did so swiftly, politely but Tsuki was more protective of her body than ever before. They fitted a kimono to her, all falling silent for a moment and as Tsuki’s eyes trailed to the mirror she understood why. It was too big. She wore one just last week, and now it was too big, which sent alarming bells off in her head. She needs a doctor, and a competent one at that… A one she could trust and one that could keep a secret. This was not good. The girls surrounded her again, one already bringing in a sewing machine. They’ll fix it but they will talk about it. Sometime, when Tsuki won’t hear them. She excused herself – there was no point staying here any longer.

Breakfast stayed in her stomach for exactly twenty minutes before it was out again. Her eyebrows knitted in worry, staring at her reflection again. Maybe tea, something, someone. Her heart was pounding with anxiety, her mind dancing around the idea to let Nanami know. She was an experienced lady, and Tsuki trusted her, she never once spoke about Yoshinori but she always knew when Tsuki’s face blushed that there was only one on her mind. She’ll find her, right after this meeting, and she’ll tell her, ask her what to do. Tsuki promised herself, right before a knock on her door announced that the meeting is in a few hours and she needed to get ready.

She never knew the face of the merchant that sat in front of her for the most part of the day. Simply because her mind was entirely elsewhere, her gaze blank, thinking about something entirely else than flower arrangements for the wedding. Even that word made her sick to her stomach but she did not overreact, just had to play the part long enough to drag everything out, give Yoshinori and Akito as much time as she could. She turned down almost every offer, requesting jungle orchids, which the merchant winced at, understanding how hard it will be to acquire those for the bouquets. The accountant lifted his eyebrows up, shooting a look at her but she never turned her gaze to him. ”Well, anything for the future clan heads of the Hyuuga, ofcourse.” The merchant glazed it over, clearly unhappy with this development. She didn’t mind appearing spoiled now, she was okay with damaging her reputation. What she was afraid off was that some of them did take notice of this sudden personality change, which didn’t help her case at all. Unfortunately for them, she also took classes on how to hide it. Accepts some things, turn down the ones that could really drag time out.

During dinner, the voices of the Hyuuga and the merchant’s family started to melt into one ringing sound. It was too hot in this room, there was no air and she was starting to get dizzy. Eating the bare minimum also didn’t help in this case, so she had to politely excuse herself, much to some people’s displeasure. She was sure they will brush it off to nervousness of the upcoming wedding. It took an immeasurable amount of will to not collapse in the hallway. She slowly but surely made her way to her room, smiling politely at a passerby and once she was in her room, she threw the kimono off, almost peeled the window open and started to breathe the cooler winter air heavily into her lungs. Knock . ”Nanami-san?” ”No, Tsuki-sama. It’s me, I would like to check up on you. ”I’d like to see Nanami-san, please.” ”Nanami-san is in the infirmary, Tsuki-sama.”

…What? Her eyes widened in realization. It’s been long since she saw Nanami, mainly because of her own missions. Her heartbeat started pounding in her ears, as she hurried to grab something to throw on herself, which was the same kimono, trembling fingers quickly wrapping it around her body. No, no, no… She practically flew out of her room, leaving the confused Hyuuga behind. Of course they didn’t tell her – once a maid is ill, she is simply replaced. None of the thought of forming a bond deep enough to care. There was anger in her tears, sadness and guilt. She stopped herself just behind the infirmary door, wiping her tears, and breathing in and out, composing herself just enough. She opened the door silently. Nanami was laying in her bed, breathing slowly and heavily, a Hyuuga nurse leaving when catching Tsuki’s gaze. She slowly approached Nanami’s bed, placing her hand on the leathered one and Nanami’s eyes opened slowly, painfully, just enough to see Tsuki. ”Tsuki-sama…””Just Tsuki, please…” The older woman attempted a smile but even that was weak. She should be in a normal hospital, not here. But both she and her knew, it was too late for that.

They sat in silence for a longer while, while the medicine kicked in and Nanami could speak, at least a bit. Tsuki stayed, her eyes fixed on her long year friend, mother figure. A person who guided her, who secretly forged Tsuki’s moral compass, with careful glances, nudges and smiles. ”You want to tell me something, Tsuki… I see it…” God, how weak her voice was. Unshed tears pooled in Tsuki’s eyes, and she looked away to compose herself. It took a few breaths, before Tsuki stood up and gently placed Nanami’s hand on her belly, revealing a deep guarded secret to her. The most vulnerable part of her and at the same time the most sacred one. She immediately started wiping her tears with the other hand, and Nanami just smiled in content. ”Two?” It was such a simple question, and yet it made Tsuki bite her lip, nodding, tears running in streams down her face. She knew, of course she knew and yet Tsuki was so blindsighted of Nanami’s sensory abilities. ”I knew I raised you well, when I saw you with the Tei boy… Tsuki, there’s no challenge in this world that you can’t face. And you’ll not be doing it alone…” ”Nanami…” ”Whatever you do, don’t let them seal you or them… It will be hard but there is a way, there always is… Don’t repeat my mistake and get out of this cold grave of a clan.”

Tsuki listened, nodding and crying, as she leaned in, placing her head on Nanami’s pillow, and holding her hand close to her chest. It was too soon, it was not fair… But when was life fair? Nanami hushed her, coughing herself, a painful wince on her face. She didn’t want to speak anymore, that was certain. Everything she told her, ever, was etched in her brain forever. Nanami closed her eyes again, whispering her last request. ”Tsuki, sing me that lullaby. About the ocean of stars and the moon.” Tsuki nodded, and began to sing in a hushed tone. Her voice trembled at the beginning but seeing how relaxed Nanami’s face became, she found the will in herself to continue. The candlelight dimly lit the infirmary and white curtains danced to the song of the wind, weaving together with Tsuki’s voice. When her eyes grew more tired, she hummed the melody instead, holding Nanami’s hand still, throughout the night.
. . . She woke up when the hand in her grasp was cold. She didn’t open her eyes, her tears dampening the pillow under her face. Tsuki did not know how long it lasted but she never let Nanami’s hand go. Not until someone gently opened her palm, leaving the coldness as just a feeling of where her hand was just a moment ago. They took her away, and Tsuki covered her ears with the soup of a zip. The bed still held the outlines of Nanami’s frame when she opened her eyes again. Gone. Gone…

The door opened with a Hyuuga holding a box. It was an heirloom small chest, with the Hyuuga crest carved out, blueish in color. She raised a questioning look, her eyes dark, puffy and the Hyuuga explained this was from Nanami, her last will. Tsuki took the chest in her hands like it was made of glass and traced the outline with a trembling finger. It was locked and before she could ask, a key was presented to her. With a nod, she dismissed the Hyuuga and clicked the lock open, revealing handwritten notes. At first, they made no sense, until her eyes caught the name:

Tanseigan.